Kodsnack 82 - It's very difficult to make a joke in this space

We chat with James Mickens, researcher and most likely funniest man at Microsoft, live on stage during Øredev 2014. Topics include C development, the purity of incrementation, death by specifications, scandinavian death metal and its font choices and also British football, distributed systems and the problems you encounter dealing with them. The downsides of being stuck alone in a set of universes is that Stack overflow can’t help you. And how should we fix the Javascript and web browser technology world?

Comments on the internet? No.

This recording exists as good as it is thanks to Stephen Chin of nighthacking.com for providing and masterfully wrangling all the necessary technology.

Comments, thoughts or suggestions? Discuss this episode at Techworld!

Freedom fries
Microsoft research
Distributed systems
James' talk at Øredev 2014
Handling the zombie apocalypse - James' article “The night watch”
James' talk at Monitorama 2014
Satya Nadella - CEO of Microsoft
Nuclear proliferation
Segfault
Logical shift
Logical AND
Malmö
Logical OR
W3C - World wide web consortium
Web components
Web components templates
Gorgoroth
Fibonacci
Factorial
Fizz buzz
Sepultura
King diamond
British steel
Notepad
Web workers
Crom - James' system for speculative Javascript execution
Speculative execution
Total recall
Firebug
Galactus
Odin
The Shellshock bug
Turtles all the way down
Jquery
Angular
XHR
MDN - Mozilla developer network, great source of Javascript and browser API documentation
Git
The grandfather paradox
Polyfill
asm.js
NoSQL
Mongodb
Bare metal
Just in time compiler
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs
let-satement
Zeus
Quirksmode.org
Yo
Leviticus
Registry
ASCII art
About:config
Max TCP connections
Shockwave
Singularity
DVR - Digital video recorder
Futures
Bendgate
Captain America’s shield
Georgia
Tomfoolery
4chan
Huge sloths

Titles

This is just Hollywood stuff
We’ll edit this out with CGI
What happens on the set
#freedom #america
What prevents me from being a happy person in life
It cheapens the art
Homelessness is bad too
At least you have hope
Do you like iteration?
I only increment variables
Only go forward
Black Gandalf
Not just fair or balanced
Otto von Hyphen
We laugh to stop from crying
Darkness is delightful
The great thing about scandinavian death metal
What would Beelzebub do?
That TV is in the cloud now
Like jazz musicians
Like trying to write Inception 2
The left hand of satan
Multiple speculative universes
What universe am I in?
A low-rent Stephen Hawking
Firebug had no notion of my separate universes
The Odin object
In the regular development world
Chicanery all the way down
Function calls are not our strong point
Not nothing will happen
XHR:s over passenger pidgeon
LOL I took a hard dependency on it
It’s very difficult to make a joke in this space
We don’t even issue writes
devnulldb
But we have hoverboards
Tread carefully on the polyfills
Close the tab and reboot the machine
This is such a character builder
Mumblefoo.js
Fast Javascript, and cancer
No-lock cancer
Asynchronous cancer
That kitten on a tradmill is not going to watch itself
Another special type of disaster
Folk wisdom on the web
127i content
Emu futures
If I had a website, I’d run it like Singapore
Every computer should come with an old person
This whole alternate semantic reality