I Think I Love My Wife
109 episodes - English - Latest episode: 11 months ago - ★★★★★ - 65 ratingsThis podcast explores the inner workings, struggles, challenges, and beauty of being in a relationship. It goes deep in uncovering how people have overcome challenges to become engaged and then married. It intentionally focuses on getting perspective from married men of color, especially married Black men, while providing a platform where people can learn from their stories. This podcast also highlights the mental burdens that stem from societal pressures, generational curses, gender related norms, and personal expectations.
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Episodes
S03.E15 - Darrin Part 1: Selflessly Selfish
June 05, 2023 05:04 - 51 minutes - 41.6 MBIn this episode (Selflessly Selfish), I discuss with Darrin how he navigated obstacles such as long distance, being an entrepreneur, and infidelity prior to getting married as well as how those lessons learned has helped him become a good husband. We focus on the challenges that come with trying to satisfy your passions as well as your partner. I talk about the importance of having someone that supports you and your passions. We explore the tough calls and tradeoffs you have to make when d...
S03.E14 - Carlton Part 3: The benefit of truly learning somebody
May 08, 2023 06:03 - 1 hour - 55 MBIn this episode (The benefit of truly learning somebody), I wrap up my conversation with Carlton as we talk through the benefit of truly learning someone and having a healthy sex life in a marriage. We discuss the challenge that men have listening instead of problem-solving. We highlight the intentionality required to develop organic and strong relationships with the in-laws. We examine the importance of sex in a marriage and maintaining an active sexual dynamic throughout the years. We co...
S03.E13 - Carlton Part 2: The unfortunate part of dating
May 01, 2023 05:47 - 50 minutes - 40.4 MBIn this episode (The unfortunate part of dating), I discuss the value of knowing your person’s heart with Carlton as he shares more of his journey in marriage and in fatherhood. We talk about why guys are okay dating more than one person at the same time and the tradeoffs you make while dating multiple people. We discuss how harder it becomes to date as people get older and considerations for living with your partner prior to marriage. We examine the need for parity in a relationship and b...
S03.E12 - Carlton Part 1: Am I really willing to do the work?
April 24, 2023 08:29 - 44 minutes - 35.6 MBIn this episode (Am I really willing to do the work?), I discuss the feeling of knowing when you know and how they led to Carlton dating someone he randomly met prior to graduating college as well as their journey in marriage. We discuss the importance of being intentional when getting to know someone. We break down the process of knowing that you know and how specific experiences can solidify how a guy feels about a woman. We also dive deep in what it means when a guy says “you know when...
S03.E11 - Courtney Part 3: I could have went off the rails
April 17, 2023 06:50 - 52 minutes - 42.2 MBIn this episode (I could have went off the rails), I wrap up my conversation with Courtney discussing critical moments that challenged his marriage early onsuch as dealing with a miscarriage and overcoming a severe covid experience. We emphasize the need to find time and space for yourself in the midst of internal and external chaos so you can show up better for your partner and family. Help support the podcast so it can continue to give you quality content. Donations of support can be mad...
S03.E10 - Courtney Part 2: From supporting myself to supporting three
April 10, 2023 05:33 - 40 minutes - 32.7 MBIn this episode (From supporting myself to supporting three), I talk to Courtney about his journey of becoming a stepfather. We discuss the importance of creating boundaries and relationship norms while learning to be a stepfather. We dive into the conversations required to engage as a parental figure while dating. We highlight why you should break through taboo norms and not wait very long to have meaningful conversations on important topics (i.e., life goals, salary/income). Help support...
S03.E09 - Courtney Part 1: Shoutout to Bumble!
April 03, 2023 04:44 - 57 minutes - 46 MBIn this episode (Shoutout to Bumble!), I discuss how Courtney’s match on Bumble turned from a casual dating scenario to a marriage. We talk about dating a woman with a child and navigating how to build individual relationships with both. We highlight his doubts and misconceptions. We also examine the natural progression men go through in their journey towards marriage. Black-owned bourbon brand named in this episode is by the Brough Brothers Distillery (https://broughbrothers.com). Please ...
S03.E08 - Jourdan Part 2: I don't want a cheerleader
March 27, 2023 05:33 - 1 hour - 63.9 MBIn this episode (I don’t want a cheerleader), I wrap up my conversation with Jourdan as he explains his need to have a partner he can trust and that can hold their own as he navigates his marriage with someone of a different ethic, cultural, and religious background. We run back their decision to not live with each other, despite moving to a new city together. We talk through navigating the differences between expectations and preferences. We discuss the importance of having tough convers...
S03.E07 - Jourdan Part 1: We never look at anybody’s Ls
March 20, 2023 06:37 - 50 minutes - 40.8 MBIn this episode (We never look at anybody’s Ls), I talk to Jourdan about his reluctance in participating in the dating game and how being honest with himself and what he wanted led to him finding his wife. We examine the world of dating today and thematic problems that people face. We discuss taking a different approach to dating and the importance of strong communication and being upfront with people from jump. We dive into navigating dating while focusing on life’s other priorities. We ...
S03.E06 - Julian Part 3: We took the first baby for granted
March 13, 2023 06:22 - 35 minutes - 28.5 MBIn this episode (We took the first baby for granted), I wrap up my conversation with Julian, reflecting on an emotionally tough period in his marriage, dealing with pregnancy issues, and having a rainbow baby We talk about how it was supporting a pregnant wife while living long distance. We discuss the difficulty of having to terminate a pregnancy. We highlight the importance of not checking out during traumatic and emotionally heavy situations. We also dive deep on dealing with the fears ...
S03.E05 - Julian Part 2: Titles and definitions have to be the same
March 06, 2023 07:28 - 37 minutes - 29.8 MBIn this episode (Titles and definitions have to be the same), I continue my conversation with Julian as we reflect on dating apps and attributes he saw in his wife leading to his proposal. We highlight important attributes to look for in a partner. We discuss swiping with intentions on the dating apps. We examine the importance of supporting your partner in the midst of adversity. We also dissect how pivotal it can be to see how someone shows up for you, especially in areas of vulnerabilit...
S03.E04 - Julian Part 1: You have to let yourself heal first
February 27, 2023 07:51 - 47 minutes - 38.5 MBIn this episode (You have to let yourself heal first), I discuss finding love after a serious breakup with Julian and talk about his journey towards marriage and the road to fatherhood. We talk about recovering from a breakup after a long-term relationship. We discuss the importance of listening to your gut. We examine the scary part of giving up control when in a relationship. We conclude this episode highlighting the value of talking to a therapist and how helpful it can be, especially a...
S03.E03 - Nkem Part 3: You're supposed to be the rock
February 20, 2023 08:46 - 1 hour - 49.1 MBIn this episode (You’re supposed to be the rock), I conclude my conversation with Nkem discussing key aspects he considered in getting married and that he values in his marriage. We investigate the importance of marrying someone in the same culture. We discuss why for some guys it’s important for a woman to take their last name. We highlight how it is growing up in the Nigerian culture and the impact it can have on relationships. We examine the difference between being the rock for your fa...
S03.E02 - Nkem Part 2: The streets retired me
February 13, 2023 05:45 - 54 minutes - 43.8 MBIn this episode (The streets retired me), Nkem and I examine some of the issues he had to overcome in his long distance relationship and marriage. We talk about when guys start looking for marriage in a relationship. We highlight how moving in with someone is a big step and some of the considerations to factor if doing it before marriage. We agree on the necessity of having tough conversations with people in a respectful way. We emphasize the importance of having positive experiences in da...
S03.E01 - Nkem Part 1: Seeing more cons than pros
February 06, 2023 05:58 - 1 hour - 53.6 MBIn this episode (Seeing more cons than pros), I discuss with Nkem how he transformed a long distance relationship into a marriage. We talk about doing things out of obligation and provide our thoughts on whether love and logic go together in a relationship. He explains how understanding love languages are even more essential when in a long distance relationship. He shares his belief that men know where they fall in a pack and should shoot within their range. We highlight how men are not t...
B02.E04 - Not a fan of the term dating
January 30, 2023 06:24 - 41 minutes - 33.3 MBIn this episode (Not a fan of the term dating), I provide a recap of what has been going on within me, share why there has been so much time between seasons, and express why I am not a fan of the term dating. Major theme from this episode include: Life lifes at times and there’s nothing wrong with focusing on the things you choose to prioritize Some of you wanted my “advice” so I got certified as a life coach and started a business called Nelo Effect (www.neloeffect.com) where I offer ...
B02.E03 - Mosiac Matchmaking Part 3: Get your no's out of the way early
September 26, 2022 07:32 - 39 minutes - 31.9 MBIn this episode (Get your no’s out of the way early), I wrap up my conversation with Brooke Fitzpatrick, the founder of Mosaic Matchmaking and l get her thoughts as a dating coach. We talk about the costs of dating and some of the thoughts that go into asking a woman out on a date. We examine what’s a reasonable amount of time to chat before you move off the apps with a match. We discuss common complaints that people have with dating apps. We breakdown the advantages and disadvantages of s...
B02.E02 - Mosiac Matchmaking Part 2: Women should participate in courtship
September 19, 2022 06:55 - 23 minutes - 18.8 MBIn this episode (Woman should participate in courtship), I learn more about Mosaic Matchmaking with its founder Brooke Fitzpatrick We learn how she sets expectations for client’s and the potential matches and how she goes about matching them. We spend a great deal of time talking about how important it is to invest in your dating app profile. She highlights common issues she hears from her clients and why they choose to go with a matchmaking service. We share our thoughts on dating multipl...
B02.E01 - Mosiac Matchmaking Part 1: Matchmaking as a Service
September 12, 2022 04:59 - 36 minutes - 29 MBIn this episode (Matchmaking as a Service), I discuss with Brooke Fitzpatrick, the founder of Mosaic Matchmaking, and learn about her business, how she got started, and how she coaches singles as well as matches them with viable candidates. We talk about what she’s hearing from both men and women who are trying to find love. She highlights the importance of taking some risks while dating and what comes with the territory of putting your heart out there. We learn about her philosophy when i...
S02.E16 - DJ Part 3: Marriage is extremely dynamic
January 18, 2021 02:45 - 41 minutes - 33.1 MBIn this episode (Marriage is extremely dynamic), I wrap up my conversation with a guy who’s met his partner in Vegas while visiting from another country and examine his journey to marriage and fatherhood. We talk about the importance of making space and time for yourself, especially in a relationship. We discuss finances and allocating money for your personal hobbies and individual needs. We highlight the intentionality required to keep the spark alive in a marriage. We dive deep on balanc...
S02.E16 - Marriage is extremely dynamic
January 18, 2021 02:45 - 41 minutes - 33.1 MBIn this episode (Marriage is extremely dynamic), I wrap up my conversation with a guy who’s met his partner in Vegas while visiting from another country and examine his journey to marriage and fatherhood. We talk about the importance of making space and time for yourself, especially in a relationship. We discuss finances and allocating money for your personal hobbies and individual needs. We highlight the intentionality required to keep the spark alive in a marriage. We dive deep on balanc...
S02.E15 - Stick to your guns
January 11, 2021 05:44 - 1 hour - 50.8 MBIn this episode (Stick to your guns), I continue my conversation with a guy who’s met his partner in Vegas while visiting from another country and examine his journey to marriage and fatherhood. We talk about the male ego and when we need to check it. We discuss the attractiveness of women who can take charge and the importance of seeing your partner actively make an effort towards the things you ask for. We uncover the blessings that going through seasons early in a relationship can provi...
S02.E15 - DJ Part 2: Stick to your guns
January 11, 2021 05:44 - 1 hour - 50.8 MBIn this episode (Stick to your guns), I continue my conversation with a guy who’s met his partner in Vegas while visiting from another country and examine his journey to marriage and fatherhood. We talk about the male ego and when we need to check it. We discuss the attractiveness of women who can take charge and the importance of seeing your partner actively make an effort towards the things you ask for. We uncover the blessings that going through seasons early in a relationship can provi...
S02.E14 - It’s about opportunity and access
January 04, 2021 04:12 - 58 minutes - 47.1 MBIn this episode (It’s about opportunity and access), I start my conversation with a guy who’s met his partner in Vegas, while visiting from another country and examine his journey to marriage and fatherhood. We talk about the adaptability required in a relationship, especially with long distance. We discuss women being risk averse and how expectations can lead to disappointment. We explain leverage dynamics and how it tends to change hands over the course of a relationship. We highlight th...
S02.E14 - DJ Part 1: It’s about opportunity and access
January 04, 2021 04:12 - 58 minutes - 47.1 MBIn this episode (It’s about opportunity and access), I start my conversation with a guy who’s met his partner in Vegas, while visiting from another country and examine his journey to marriage and fatherhood. We talk about the adaptability required in a relationship, especially with long distance. We discuss women being risk averse and how expectations can lead to disappointment. We explain leverage dynamics and how it tends to change hands over the course of a relationship. We highlight th...
S02.E13 - Trey Part 2: It wasn't a full court press
December 14, 2020 05:52 - 36 minutes - 29.6 MBIn this episode (It wasn’t a full court press), I continue my conversation with a guy I’ve known for 20+ years, who’s been remarried, and examine his journey towards finding love with the right person. We talk about the mixed messages that “courting” can send a woman in certain situations and how it can look like a full court press when it’s not really one. We explain how men may react differently to a woman giving him what feels like demands. We discuss the differences between stating exp...
S02.E13 - It wasn't a full court press
December 14, 2020 05:52 - 36 minutes - 29.6 MBIn this episode (It wasn’t a full court press), I continue my conversation with a guy I’ve known for 20+ years, who’s been remarried, and examine his journey towards finding love with the right person. We talk about the mixed messages that “courting” can send a woman in certain situations and how it can look like a full court press when it’s not really one. We explain how men may react differently to a woman giving him what feels like demands. We discuss the differences between stating exp...
S02.E12 - Trey Part 1: I was definitely on her B team
December 07, 2020 04:59 - 45 minutes - 36.2 MBIn this episode (I was definitely on her B-Team), I start my conversation with a guy I’ve known for 20+ years, who’s been remarried, and examine his journey towards finding love with the right person. We talk about the desire to hedge even though we have something good right in front of us. We discuss how some people get married and not know the real reasons why. We dive deep in navigating the feelings, reflection, and next steps associated with getting a divorce. We show how men still hav...
S02.E12 - I was definitely on her B team
December 07, 2020 04:59 - 45 minutes - 36.2 MBIn this episode (I was definitely on her B-Team), I start my conversation with a guy I’ve known for 20+ years, who’s been remarried, and examine his journey towards finding love with the right person. We talk about the desire to hedge even though we have something good right in front of us. We discuss how some people get married and not know the real reasons why. We dive deep in navigating the feelings, reflection, and next steps associated with getting a divorce. We show how men still hav...
S02.E11 - She taught me how to love
November 30, 2020 05:12 - 1 hour - 55.9 MBIn this episode (She taught me how to love), I continue my conversation with the father of a friend, who's been married for almost 30 years, and examine his journey towards getting married at a young age and his personal growth over time. We discuss the importance of developing a solid relationship with the in-laws. We talk about the perspective of treating your marriage like a family business. We share our thoughts on navigating the process to identify areas of improvement in a relationsh...
S02.E11 - Todd Part 2: She taught me how to love
November 30, 2020 05:12 - 1 hour - 55.9 MBIn this episode (She taught me how to love), I continue my conversation with the father of a friend, who's been married for almost 30 years, and examine his journey towards getting married at a young age and his personal growth over time. We discuss the importance of developing a solid relationship with the in-laws. We talk about the perspective of treating your marriage like a family business. We share our thoughts on navigating the process to identify areas of improvement in a relationsh...
S02.E10 - Marriage is a job
November 23, 2020 00:38 - 51 minutes - 41.7 MBIn this episode (Marriage is a job), I start a conversation with the father of a friend, who's been married for almost 30 years, and examine his journey towards getting married at a young age and his personal growth over time. We share thoughts on how your perspective on relationships can change when a child is on the way. We talk about dating versus courting and how it looks different when a woman checks all of your boxes. We highlight the ways guys look at dating and the categories we pu...
S02.E010 - Marriage is a job
November 23, 2020 00:38 - 51 minutes - 41.7 MBIn this episode (Marriage is a job), I start a conversation with the father of a friend, who's been married for almost 30 years, and examine his journey towards getting married at a young age and his personal growth over time. We share thoughts on how your perspective on relationships can change when a child is on the way. We talk about dating versus courting and how it looks different when a woman checks all of your boxes. We highlight the ways guys look at dating and the categories we pu...
S02.E10 - Todd Part 1: Marriage is a job
November 23, 2020 00:38 - 51 minutes - 41.7 MBIn this episode (Marriage is a job), I start a conversation with the father of a friend, who's been married for almost 30 years, and examine his journey towards getting married at a young age and his personal growth over time. We share thoughts on how your perspective on relationships can change when a child is on the way. We talk about dating versus courting and how it looks different when a woman checks all of your boxes. We highlight the ways guys look at dating and the categories we pu...
S02.E09 - It's a constant recalibration
November 16, 2020 02:52 - 58 minutes - 46.7 MBIn this episode (It’s a constant recalibration), I wrap my conversation with a friend, who's been married for 17 years, and examine his journey towards marriage with his high school “crush” and the obstacles and challenges they have faced while dating and in marriage. We talk about the role money plays in their relationship and how they do finances. We discuss how maturity on both sides changes with age. We highlight the importance of having your partner’s support. We explain what it means...
S02.E09 - Bryan Part 3: It's a constant recalibration
November 16, 2020 02:52 - 58 minutes - 46.7 MBIn this episode (It’s a constant recalibration), I wrap my conversation with a friend, who's been married for 17 years, and examine his journey towards marriage with his high school “crush” and the obstacles and challenges they have faced while dating and in marriage. We talk about the role money plays in their relationship and how they do finances. We discuss how maturity on both sides changes with age. We highlight the importance of having your partner’s support. We explain what it means...
S02.E08 - Bryan Part 2: Men are mad emotional
November 09, 2020 04:23 - 58 minutes - 46.9 MBIn this episode (Men are mad emotional), I continue my conversation with a friend, who's been married for 17 years, and examine his journey towards marriage with his high school “crush” and the obstacles and challenges they have faced while dating and in marriage. We talk about dating versus courting and recognizing red flags. We discuss navigating the clock and condensed timelines that women have. We go deep on the strain that a lack of intimacy can put on a relationship. We highlight som...
S02.E08 - Men are mad emotional
November 09, 2020 04:23 - 58 minutes - 46.9 MBIn this episode (Men are mad emotional), I continue my conversation with a friend, who's been married for 17 years, and examine his journey towards marriage with his high school “crush” and the obstacles and challenges they have faced while dating and in marriage. We talk about dating versus courting and recognizing red flags. We discuss navigating the clock and condensed timelines that women have. We go deep on the strain that a lack of intimacy can put on a relationship. We highlight som...
S02.E07 - I'm a friend zone survivor
November 02, 2020 03:49 - 48 minutes - 38.7 MBIn this episode (I’m a friend zone survivor), I start a conversation with a friend, who's been married for 17 years, and examine his journey towards marriage with his high school "crush” and the obstacles and challenges they have faced while dating and in marriage. We talk about falling in love with your best friend and the importance of having a partner that is self-sufficient. We discuss navigating the digital era as well as how it’s changed the way people date and interact. We uncover s...
S02.E07 - Bryan Part 1: I'm a friend zone survivor
November 02, 2020 03:49 - 48 minutes - 38.7 MBIn this episode (I’m a friend zone survivor), I start a conversation with a friend, who's been married for 17 years, and examine his journey towards marriage with his high school "crush” and the obstacles and challenges they have faced while dating and in marriage. We talk about falling in love with your best friend and the importance of having a partner that is self-sufficient. We discuss navigating the digital era as well as how it’s changed the way people date and interact. We uncover s...
S02.E06 - Putting my feelings aside
October 26, 2020 04:01 - 1 hour - 49 MBIn this episode (Putting my feelings aside), I wrap up my conversation exploring love and relationship as I talk to a friend, who's been married for 7 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have handled various challenges and adventures. We talk about the role money can have in a relationship. We discuss what the vows of marriage mean and the value of doing life with someone who understands you. We highlight different communication pro tips. We dive deep on...
S02.E06 - Jomar Part 3: Putting my feelings aside
October 26, 2020 04:01 - 1 hour - 49 MBIn this episode (Putting my feelings aside), I wrap up my conversation exploring love and relationship as I talk to a friend, who's been married for 7 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have handled various challenges and adventures. We talk about the role money can have in a relationship. We discuss what the vows of marriage mean and the value of doing life with someone who understands you. We highlight different communication pro tips. We dive deep on...
S02.E05 - Jomar Part 2: Casting unnecessary blame
October 19, 2020 01:34 - 50 minutes - 40.3 MBIn this episode (Casting unnecessary blame), I continue my conversation exploring love and relationship as I talk to a friend, who's been married for 7 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have handled various challenges and adventures. We talk about contemplating divorce and the things that led to that like communication issues, aligning on love languages, as well as the domino effect that it can cause. He explains how him and his wife got over the hump ...
S02.E05 - Casting unnecessary blame
October 19, 2020 01:34 - 50 minutes - 40.3 MBIn this episode (Casting unnecessary blame), I continue my conversation exploring love and relationship as I talk to a friend, who's been married for 7 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have handled various challenges and adventures. We talk about contemplating divorce and the things that led to that like communication issues, aligning on love languages, as well as the domino effect that it can cause. He explains how him and his wife got over the hump ...
S02.E04 - Jomar Part 1: We tend to proceed before acknowledging
October 12, 2020 03:12 - 47 minutes - 38 MBIn this episode (We tend to proceed before acknowledging), I explore navigating a relationship through marriage, tough career decisions, and intentions to grow a family. I talk to a friend, who's been married for 7 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have handled various challenges and adventures. We discuss the sacrifices made for a long distance relationship and the collective critical decision making points that come up. We go further to talk through...
S02.E04 - We tend to proceed before acknowledging
October 12, 2020 03:12 - 47 minutes - 38 MBIn this episode (We tend to proceed before acknowledging), I explore navigating a relationship through marriage, tough career decisions, and intentions to grow a family. I talk to a friend, who's been married for 7 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have handled various challenges and adventures. We discuss the sacrifices made for a long distance relationship and the collective critical decision making points that come up. We go further to talk through...
S02.E03 - Mik Part 3: How do I out serve her
October 05, 2020 01:29 - 52 minutes - 42 MBIn this episode (How do I out serve her), I wrap my conversation with a friend, who's been married for 5 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have navigated challenging times. We discuss service leadership in a relationship and the mentality to out serve your partner. We talk about the roles and responsibilities in the household and the importance of having a partner that will hold you accountable. We debate the perception of the term “head of household”...
S02.E03 - How do I out serve her
October 05, 2020 01:29In this episode (How do I out serve her), I wrap my conversation with a friend, who's been married for 5 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have navigated challenging times. We discuss service leadership in a relationship and the mentality to out serve your partner. We talk about the roles and responsibilities in the household and the importance of having a partner that will hold you accountable. We debate the perception of the term “head of household”...
S02.E03 - How do I out serve her
October 05, 2020 01:29In this episode (How do I out serve her), I wrap my conversation with a friend, who's been married for 5 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have navigated challenging times. We discuss service leadership in a relationship and the mentality to out serve your partner. We talk about the roles and responsibilities in the household and the importance of having a partner that will hold you accountable. We debate the perception of the term “head of household”...
S02.E02 - Mik Part 2: The little things add up
September 28, 2020 02:01 - 44 minutes - 35.7 MBIn this episode (The little things add up), I continue my conversation with a friend, who's been married for 5 years, and examine his journey towards marriage and how he and his wife have navigated challenging times. We discuss evaluating someone as a wife versus a girlfriend and the difference between dating and courting. We talk about how he made his long distance relationship work and the grace required to be successful. We go deep to understand the benefits and concerns brought on from...