It's finally here! The moment we’ve been waiting for! Bachelorette Clare’s guys have officially been announced by ABC and because we are such professionals, Some Guy in Austin and I combed through each bio, critiqued each Instagram account, and performed some light stalking to bring you the latest dirt on 31 men vying for Clare’s heart.

Questions we asked ourselves:

Is hybrid hair paste is a thing?Why does Brenden claim the turtleneck is his signature look, yet he’s not wearing a turtleneck in his profile pic? Is Bennett or Jeremy the bigger chach?

Here’s what we learned:

How many men presented themselves in various states of toplessnessWhat are the odds we WON’T confuse Blake Monar and Kenny with one another? Why are several participants a decade or more younger than Clare? I thought she weeded out the fetuses?

Here’s to you, Mrs. Robinson…

EPISODE NOTES:

Here are the official bios of Bachelorette Clare's guys!

Here's the helpful document I made, complete with the contestant's Instagram links. Stalk away!

And here's the link to our official Bachelorette Bracket we are playing with my favorite sports podcast, Last Night's Game. I can't wait!!!

SHOW NOTES:

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