Madame Web – Ms. Spider-Cleo

Madame Web is Sony's latest vapid entry in their ever burgeoning catalogue of films centering around the villains of Spider-Man.

And, yes, like Morbius, that hero is nowhere to be seen. In fact, since the film largely takes place in 2003, he hasn't even been born yet.

Our heroine here is Cassandra Webb, an EMT born with powers she has yet to realize she's been given. The how and the why of that truly need to be seen to be believed.

Webb (the eventual Madame Web) can see glimpses of the future. In doing so, she makes it her business to save three young girls who will most certainly die without her help.

Anyway, the central antagonist, Ezekiel Sims, goes on this quest for vengeance for reasons; Webb's most effective form of combatting Sims—outside of clairvoyance, of course—is attempted vehicular homicide; and you will leave the theater wondering what circle of hell Sony has propelled you into.

Madame Web is as bad as advertised. It is a film that need not exist. An origin of an origin, the three future Spider-Women don't even wear their costumes in the actual timeline of the film. Those appear solely in glimpses of a future we'll never see. I'd say the 12% is justified, but even that was probably too kind.

Now, sit back, drown your sorrows with a Depth Perception Imperial IPA from Terrapin Beer Co., and watch out for that Pepsi sign! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Bling Blake, Capt. Cash, and Chumpzilla are table dancing to Toxic at a roadside diner!

This Week’s Segments:

Introduction/Plot Breakdown – Her web connects them all! (00:00)
Lingering Questions – Why does Sony continue to foist these turds upon us? (33:40)
The "Great Power Will Come" Trivia Challenge – Chumpzilla challenges the field to trivia about the movie. (56:45)
Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We continue Super-Heroic Flops with a sequel that couldn't match its predecessor's success, Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom! (1:06:44)

And, as always, hit us up on Threads, Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids from this week’s episode!

You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, Podbean, Spotify, Acast, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Vurbl, Amazon Music, and more!