Han Nefkens artwork

Han Nefkens

83 episodes - English - Latest episode: 17 days ago -

In hopes of forging new connections, I've decided to start this podcast. I've learned that when you share you are not alone, even if you don't know the person you're sharing with. 

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Episodes

Episode 83: To go through life without an image of yourself

April 10, 2024 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.29 MB

‘I would like to live life outwards, so that wonderment takes over from pointless inner criticism.’

Episode 82: Less rain dancing

March 25, 2024 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.33 MB

“Planning has become a ritual to keep misfortune at bay, something akin to a rain dance.”

Episode 81: My unwavering resistance to the passage of time

March 08, 2024 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.29 MB

Only by resisting the passing of time do I give meaning to my life’

Episode 80: Closer to the core

February 15, 2024 00:00 - 6 minutes - 7.97 MB

"I cannot help but think that throughout the years, layers were put over that core freedom.”

Episode 79: Where is the horizon now?

January 26, 2024 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.29 MB

“Can I only take it easy when I know that I have limited time left for an easy life?”

Episode 78: What to do with unwelcome information?

January 16, 2024 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.22 MB

"What to believe? The theory that appeals to me? Or the opposite, which disappointingly leaves everything as it was?” 

Episode 77: How life presented itself forty-five years ago

December 28, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.07 MB

“When I think of all the paths not chosen, my head begins to spin.”

Episode 76: Sinterklaas or to believe or not to believe

December 05, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.85 MB

“Perhaps my being sceptical is not only a rational way to approach life, but also a protection against my hidden desire to believe.”

Episode 75: A head filled with contradictions

November 14, 2023 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.07 MB

“My longing to forget is as strong as the duty I feel to honor those lost.”

Episode 74: My unexpected companion

October 27, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.54 MB

“A frowzy dog from a mountain village made me feel special.”

Episode 73: An expression of love

October 12, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.94 MB

‘There we stood in the room of a luxury hotel in Kuala Lumpur, two complete strangers embracing each other.’

Episode 72: Clashing images

September 18, 2023 00:00 - 2 minutes - 2.98 MB

“It leaves me wondering how much time I spend in a haze of misinterpretation and fantasy.”

Episode 71: A collage in motion

September 01, 2023 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.09 MB

"I want to live up to an image I've created in my head."

Episode 70: The battle between my brain and me

July 21, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.11 MB

“What particularly disconcerts me is that my brain takes decisions without consulting me”

Episode 69: The many jackets I wear

July 06, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.03 MB

“I wonder if identity is a jacket you put on and exchange for another according to circumstances.”

Episode 68: The observer

June 15, 2023 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.22 MB

“My writing is not only the affirmation of my life but of all life.”

Episode 67: Keith Jarret or the art of surrendering

June 01, 2023 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.22 MB

“ Why do I feel I have to hold back? Is it because certain thoughts are not suitable to be shared?”

Episode 66: To possess other eyes

May 19, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.99 MB

“The awe of discovering the unknown is the most exhilarating experience I can have.”

Episode 65: How my senses seem to have changed

May 04, 2023 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.21 MB

“It's as if my senses have become more perceptive.”

Episode 64: Life as a Lego game

April 21, 2023 00:00 - 2 minutes - 2.63 MB

“Certain props make us feel better about ourselves and our lives.”

Episode 63: Photos not taken

April 07, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.1 MB

‘ Making the fleeting tangible is my way of resisting the impermanent nature of life.’ 

Episode 62: I am the sky

March 23, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.93 MB

‘How can I take these feelings seriously when they are in fact echoes of what occurred long ago?’

Episode 61: Question marks

March 10, 2023 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.24 MB

“I know less but I see more.”

Episode 60: Momodou

February 23, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.12 MB

‘I know from experience that nothing makes us feel lonelier than feeling invisible.’

Episode 59: Feeling the gaze of my readers

February 09, 2023 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.27 MB

‘Am I writing to be seen, just to feel the gaze of my readers?’

Episode 58: Anatole France or Hegel

January 27, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.38 MB

‘Had our desire to fantasize been stronger than our grasp on reality?’ 

Episode 57: The soothing pleasure of the known

January 12, 2023 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.52 MB

“Has my stock of memories grown so much in these sixty-eight years that it is beginning to inundate the number of things I can fantasize about, like an overflowing reservoir?”

Episode 56: White bread with strawberry jam

December 30, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.75 MB

“By sharing his remembrances, our lives become even more intertwined”

Episode 55: Thriller

December 16, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.77 MB

"Was my desire to be back in that moment of not knowing so overpowering that it swept away those forty years?" 

Episode 54: A blessing

December 01, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.55 MB

‘I feel that I haven't even started to untangle the complexities in the world and in my head.’ 

Episode 53: Standing together on one leg

November 18, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.06 MB

 ‘The power of support and collaboration has marked these past thirty-five years as much as the many challenges.’

Episode 52: I have solution for your problem

October 28, 2022 00:00 - 1 minute - 3.65 MB

‘I still feel that I’m lazy. It's a kind of mental anorexia completely disconnected from reality.’

Episode 51: What I tell myself

October 13, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.64 MB

“I talk about the importance of flow but at the same time, I block myself”. 

Episode 50: Love thyself last

September 29, 2022 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.38 MB

‘Thanks to Shakespeare, a passion for myself is no longer compulsory.’

Episode 49: An innocent game

September 15, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.75 MB

"I would like to dance through life without the nonsensical demands I make of myself."

Episode 48: Sailing rather than rowing

September 01, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.33 MB

"My fear of wasting time makes me waste time."

Episode 47: A minor act of sabotage

August 18, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.26 MB

Am I addicted to the feeling of having fallen short because it’s a feeling I know so well, even though I dislike it?

Episode 46: A photo for the family chat

August 05, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.13 MB

“It was the clinging to those moments I remembered more than the moments themselves.”

Episode 45: Taking the plunge

July 21, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.85 MB

“Am I so intimidated by that empty screen that my mind goes equally blank?”

Episode 44: It's quiet in Amsterdam

July 13, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.46 MB

"How little we know of ourselves". 

Episode 43: Letting go of my convictions

July 08, 2022 00:00 - 33 minutes - 4.09 MB

“How valid are my criteria that are so informed by my cultural background?”

Episode 42: Noise cancelling fantasies

June 23, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.54 MB

“Unlike an idea, a fantasy is not meant to be put to action. But can a fantasy grow into an idea?”  

Episode 41: I miss our old home

June 10, 2022 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.43 MB

“How will the friends who’ve passed away find us back now that we’ve moved?”

Episode 40: The caged bird sings differently

May 27, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.75 MB

"What are the bars with which I’ve built my own cage? "

Episode 39: Why I need my dog to help me write

May 12, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.74 MB

“Like a self-fulfilling prophecy, the fear of not being able to write keeps me from writing.”

Episode 38: Routine

April 28, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.3 MB

“I don’t feel survivors’ guilt but rather survivors’ indignation.”

Episode 37: Dinner invitation; or how the fear of missing out has come back with a vengeance.

April 14, 2022 00:00 - 2 minutes - 3.28 MB

"Now that the world is calling, I find it hard to resist"

Episode 36: I am a temporary orphan

April 01, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.15 MB

"Am I being sentimental because I've had too little input so that I give exaggerated importance to small things?" 

Episode 35: May 2010 – Notion Motion

March 17, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 4.29 MB

“You know a work of art is good if it moves you as much or even more the second time you see it.”

Episode 34: September 2009 – Finger on her Cheek

March 10, 2022 00:00 - 3 minutes - 3.83 MB

“I’m moved by the idea that I now have a role in the museum whose art works triggered my imagination when I was a boy.”