Green Blooded Bastard's Movie Commentary Podcast
748 episodes - English - Latest episode: 12 days ago - ★★★★★ - 1 ratingThe Green Blooded Bastard podcasts primarily feature movie commentaries. While they do not cure cancer or offer profound insights into filmmaking, they may provide a touch of humor, and be warned; I swear a lot. In addition to the free weekly movie episodes, I occasionally post side podcasts on the main feed. These include a Star Trek-focused show titled The Bastard Boldly Goes, a Battlestar Galactica series called Fat Apollo is Life, a Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman commentary known as The Bastard V Lois & Clark, an ALF-themed podcast I Am, Therefore I Watch Alf, and an Ash vs Evil Dead show named Ash vs Evil Dead vs The Bastard. Sometimes, I write bad poetry, create chaos art, and am generally emo.
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Episodes
Green Blooded Bastard - Cigarette Burns (Masters Of Horror S1E8)
April 07, 2024 15:49 - 50 minutes - 23.3 MBGreen Blooded Bastard - Cigarette Burns (Masters Of Horror S1E8). I'm going to watch all the mini films in this whole series, and this is the eighth episode!
Green Blooded Bastard - Iron Man 3
April 01, 2024 00:16 - 2 hours - 57.5 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Iron Man 3. Whip them tiddies out! Tony Fucking Stark!
Green Blooded Bastard - Texas Chainsaw 3D
March 24, 2024 06:50 - 1 hour - 41.7 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Texas Chainsaw 3. This movie is semi-dope as hell, and Leatherface is in 3D, but it will cut you up, son!
Green Blooded Bastard - Deer Woman (Masters Of Horror S1E7)
March 17, 2024 12:44 - 56 minutes - 26.6 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Homecoming (Masters Of Horror S1E7). I'm gonna watch all the mini films in this whole series and this is the 7th episode!
Green Blooded Bastard - Don’t Worry Darling
March 10, 2024 19:37 - 1 hour - 55.6 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Don't Worry Darling. This movie is a wasted concept that is more boring than the behind-the-scenes drama. I'd say watch it once, but that's it! HAHA
Green Blooded Bastard - Iron Man 2
March 03, 2024 22:32 - 1 hour - 56.3 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Iron Man 2. Let the good times rool and then whip them tiddies out!
Green Blooded Bastard - Scooby-Doo! And KISS: Rock and Roll Mystery
February 25, 2024 16:18 - 1 hour - 36.5 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Scooby-Doo! And KISS: Rock and Roll Mystery. This movie is a fun and KISStastic film. Decent use of their music and some strange Jack Kirby inspired visuals.
Green Blooded Bastard - Silent House
February 18, 2024 15:16 - 1 hour - 38.6 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Silent House. This movie is very fucking boring and uber lame, but at least it's not that fucking animated Mario film that I watched.
Green Blooded Bastard - Ocean’s 8
February 11, 2024 18:55 - 1 hour - 48.5 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Ocean’s 8. This film is about some women stealing shit because it's fucking fun and easy and why not mother fucker!
Green Blooded Bastard - Leatherface
February 04, 2024 18:42 - 1 hour - 40.2 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Leatherface. This movie is fucking lame and is an unneeded origin for Leatherface. fuck it son!
Green Blooded Bastard - Homecoming (Masters Of Horror S1E6)
January 28, 2024 18:35 - 58 minutes - 27.4 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Homecoming (Masters Of Horror S1E6). I'm gonna watch all the mini films in this whole series and this is the 56th episode!
Green Blooded Bastard - Left Behind: Rise of the Antichrist
January 21, 2024 20:07 - 1 hour - 53.3 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Left Behind: Rise of the Antichrist. Fuck it, so this is a sequel to that Nic Cage one, so I guess I'll have to go back and watch that one now, too, because I'm a goddamned completionist.
Green Blooded Bastard - I See You
January 15, 2024 02:57 - 1 hour - 42.6 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches I See You. This movie is fucking boring and relatively lame, but at least it's not that fucking animated Mario film that I just watched.
Green Blooded Bastard - The Super Mario Bros. Movie
January 07, 2024 19:30 - 1 hour - 40.4 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Super Mario Bros. Movie! This movie is fucking boring and relatively lame and I wish I would have fallen asleep during it. #tits #ass #mario #bigdick
Green Blooded Bastard - Spider-Man: No Way Home
December 31, 2023 18:14 - 2 hours - 62.1 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Spider-Man: No Way Home. Yeah, it's the moment that you've all been waiting for p33ps! Stop your grinning and drop your linen! Marvel went balls deep with this one son!
Green Blooded Bastard - Lady Bird
December 24, 2023 18:00 - 1 hour - 42.7 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Lady Bird. It's a coming-of-age story about the titular Lady Bird and her coming of age.
Green Blooded Bastard - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze
December 18, 2023 04:00 - 1 hour - 38.1 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze. So it continues!
Green Blooded Bastard - Another Me
December 11, 2023 05:30 - 1 hour - 35.9 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Another Me. This movie is what you thought it would be, haha! Fuck Joffrey Jonas!
Green Blooded Bastard - A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors
December 04, 2023 00:48 - 1 hour - 44.1 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors. This movie is fucking tits! Love it, Live it and Balls Deep Bitches!
Green Blooded Bastard - Venom
November 26, 2023 19:40 - 1 hour - 45.5 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Venom. Tom Hardy was like hey Topher hold my beer son and jumped into the lobster tank! OH HELL YEAH SON!
Green Blooded Bastard - Some Kind Of Wonderful
November 19, 2023 18:37 - 1 hour - 43.1 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Some Kind Of Wonderful. It's a gender bender Pretty in Pink that is ready for you to give it a shot!
Green Blooded Bastard - The Most Dangerous Game
November 12, 2023 18:38 - 1 hour - 29.5 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Most Dangerous Game. Yeah, it's the film that possibly inspired the Zodiac Killer so give it a look son. It's decent for being an older film.
Green Blooded Bastard - Halloween Kills
November 05, 2023 18:20 - 1 hour - 48.7 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Halloween Kills. Yeah, it's the moment that you've all been waiting for sucka! This movie is fucking and I'l eventually record the other episodes of this trilogy later haha!
Green Blooded Bastard - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)
October 29, 2023 20:33 - 1 hour - 40.9 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990). So it begins!
Green Blooded Bastard - Terrifier 2
October 22, 2023 19:30 - 2 hours - 62 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Terrifier 2. There is a clown man that is making bad shit happen in this damn film because of reasons and stuff.
Green Blooded Bastard - Hot Shots! Part Deux
October 15, 2023 17:10 - 1 hour - 39.6 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Hot Shots! Part Deux. Yeah, it's the moment that you've all been waiting again for sucka! Stop your grinning and drop your linen! Sheen went balls deep again with this one son!
Green Blooded Bastard - Mission To Mars
October 08, 2023 17:15 - 1 hour - 49.1 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Mission To Mars. We got another amusment ride movie for you guys and gals! strap in or strap on!
Green Blooded Bastard - The Dark Knight Rises
October 01, 2023 20:41 - 2 hours - 72.4 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Dark Knight. Yeah, it's the moment that you've all been creaming for! Stop you're grinning and drop your linen! Marvel went balls deep with this one son!
Green Blooded Bastard - Hot Shots!
September 24, 2023 17:03 - 1 hour - 37.8 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Hot Shots! Yeah, it's the moment that you've all been waiting for sucka! Stop youre grinning and drop your linen! Charlie went balls deep with this one son!
Green Blooded Bastard - The Ring
September 17, 2023 16:57 - 1 hour - 49.6 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Ring. This movie is about a chick that is too cool for school and then watches a damn VHS movie and well fucking man don't you know she's fucked. This film is fucking epic and still holds up!
Green Blooded Bastard - Enola Holmes
September 10, 2023 20:29 - 1 hour - 54.3 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Enola Holmes. Yeah, it's the moment that you've all been waiting for p33ps! Stop you're grinning and drop your linen! Marvel went balls deep with this one son!
Green Blooded Bastard - R.I.P.D.
September 03, 2023 20:32 - 1 hour - 41.3 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches R.I.P.D. This movie is about a guy named Deadpool who gets killed by Kevin Bacon. He's got a hot girlfriend, and a grumpy friend named chode. Whatever.
Green Blooded Bastard - Batman: The Long Halloween, Part Two
August 27, 2023 20:13 - 1 hour - 39.9 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Batman: The Long Halloween, Part Two. This movie is part 2. Read the comic if you enjoyed this because it's excellent.
Green Blooded Bastard - War
August 20, 2023 18:58 - 1 hour - 45.9 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches War. Jet Li fucks Jason Statham in the ass as they go to WAR!
Green Blooded Bastard - The Cave (2005)
August 13, 2023 22:44 - 1 hour - 44.3 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Cave (2005)! This movie is about some wannabe dinks that find underground scary evolved monster things!
Green Blooded Bastard - Aquaman
August 06, 2023 19:45 - 2 hours - 61.8 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Aquaman. Yeah, it's the moment that you've all been waiting for suckas! Stop your grinning and drop your linen! DC went balls deep with this one son!
Green Blooded Bastard - Batman: Soul Of The Dragon
July 30, 2023 18:17 - 1 hour - 23.2 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Batman: Soul Of The Dragon. This is a movie wherein a black batman little shit kicks fast and makes friends with a ninja chick and Asian Jim Carrey fist fucks!
Green Blooded Bastard - Riddick
July 23, 2023 19:42 - 1 hour - 54.2 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Riddick! This movie is about a donkey dicked bastard that will fuck your butt to save the world because of silver eyes in space dudes!
Green Blooded Bastard - The Crying Game
July 16, 2023 18:44 - 1 hour - 51.3 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Crying Game! Beware dicks!
Green Blooded Bastard - Ghost Ship
July 09, 2023 18:40 - 1 hour - 41 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Ghost Ship. There is a demon that is making bad shit happen on this ship because of reasons and stuff.
Green Blooded Bastard - Blue Velvet
July 02, 2023 20:33 - 2 hours - 57.3 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Blue Velvet? David Fucking Lynch and a gd monkey watch Blue Velvet in the multiverse!
Green Blooded Bastard - Rise of The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie
June 25, 2023 18:27 - 1 hour - 36.4 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Rise of The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie! Time Travel Fun Time yet again, again with Turtles!
Green Blooded Bastard - A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge
June 18, 2023 18:20 - 1 hour - 39.4 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches A Nightmare On Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge. This movie is reverse-lit af son! So double get them knives out!
Green Blooded Bastard - Universal Soldier: Day Of Reckoning
June 11, 2023 21:44 - 1 hour - 49.4 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Universal Soldier: Day Of Reckoning. In this movie, the old guns barely show up to kick some ass in front of the young guns!
Green Blooded Bastard - Cruising
June 04, 2023 18:24 - 1 hour - 46.4 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Cruising. An epic fucking film that has many problems, but you should give it a chance you leather boys and girls.
Green Blooded Bastard - Buffy The Vampire Slayer
May 28, 2023 21:37 - 1 hour - 38.4 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Buffy The Vampire Slayer. A pretty fun movie and it sure is better than that shitty Transformers movie with Marky Mark FFS! Give it a watch son.
Green Blooded Bastard - The Butterfly Effect
May 21, 2023 22:33 - 1 hour - 51.8 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Butterfly Effect! This movie has a star ASSHAT KUSHNER, but it's also pretty good for being an average film, but there's not enough nudity for my refined taste!
Green Blooded Bastard - Hostel
May 14, 2023 19:30 - 1 hour - 43.1 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Hostel. Shit's fucked up son!
Green Blooded Bastard - Eraserhead
May 07, 2023 19:25 - 1 hour - 40.3 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Eraserhead. David fucking Lynch and a gd monster baby!
Green Blooded Bastard - Timecrimes
April 30, 2023 17:00 - 1 hour - 41.4 MBThe one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Timecrimes. In this movie, a dude is an unwitting time traveler who travels through time and mind fucks a dude, fist fucks a chick, and does time travel savage shit! Pretty solid film.