Vince Warnock: The Entrepreneur brain’s way of saying you are exactly where you need to be

This week I'm talking again with Vince Warnock.  Vince Warnock is an award-winning Business and Marketing Strategist, coach, author, and host of the Chasing the Insights podcast. 

An ex-radio announcer with over 20 years in marketing. Vince has been recognized by his peers with numerous awards including being named a Fearless50, a program designed by Adobe to recognize the top 50 marketers in the world who drive bold, fearless marketing and digital transformation. 

Previously the CMO at Cigna, Vince has founded multiple companies including the Chasing the Insights Academy where he empowers entrepreneurs and business owners to make sense of marketing and grow the business they have always dreamed of.

We talk about:

The mental health challenges that being an Entrepreneur presentsImposter Syndrome - that feeling like I don’t belong, I don’t deserve this, people will find out that I’m making up as I go alongThe common unhealthy view of successLearning that you aren’t alone - MANY highly successful people feel the same wayHow we self-sabotage, shut down and go darkThe value of mentors and peers who call you out and support youEntrepreneurs should be out of our comfort zone You don’t get success and prosperity in your comfort zoneThe discomfort you feel when out of your comfort zone is your brain’s way of telling you you are right where you need to be.When you are a “new” entrepreneur you don’t know what you don’t know (this is a bit of a blessing)Curiosity is an entrepreneur superpowerThe pivotal moment where he learned that by understanding others can transform your impact.How he learned his heroes were human and what that made possibleAll the best and most successful coaches and entrepreneurs have coaches - having support does not make you “less” We need to reframe asking for help as a successand so much more!

 

You can learn more about Vince here:

Website: https://chasingtheinsights.comLinked In: https://www.linkedin.com/in/vdub01/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chasingtheinsights/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vdub01/

Media outlets: 

CIO Magazine, Yahoo Finance, Bloomberg, Forbes, TechCrunch, and many many podcasts 

Vince is offering a Free Marketing Strategy Call: 

Not sure what sets you apart from everyone else?Unsure if your website is best set to convert your customers?Want someone to look over your messaging or pitch?

This is where I come in. I want to help you get a sense of clarity.

Book here: 

https://chasingtheinsights.com/free-strategy-call/

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If you are a driven entrepreneur who’s:

At the top of your game, yet find your consistent successes aren’t feeling like you thought they would,And you are ready to root out any vestiges of imposter syndrome self-sabotage that are holding you back from expanding out of your comfort zone and into your next level,AND you are ready for success that truly feels like success

Book a call with me.

We'll have an intimate conversation about you and your business. We’ll explore what what might be holding you back from enjoying your success. You’ll leave with your next step.

If you still need more help at the end of the call, and it makes sense to both of us - we'll talk about what it would look like to work together.

If this sounds good to you, click the Book Trina link ==> https://bit.ly/BookTrina

*********

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77: Vince Warnock: The Entrepreneur brains way of saying you are exactly where you need to be

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[00:00:00]

 

welcome back to the field guide to awesome folks. In my last [00:01:00] episode, I spoke again with Claire sweet about why we need to talk about money and how creating a flexible life prevents the biggest end of life regret. If you missed it, make sure to go back and check it out.

 

But don't go yet. Folks. My next guest is Vince Warnock. And we're talking about the entrepreneur's brain's way of saying that you are exactly where you need to be. Vince Warnock is an award-winning business and marketing strategist, coach, author, and host of chasing the insights podcast. An X radio announcer with over 20 years in marketing, Vince has been recognized by his peers with numerous awards, including being named. A fearless 50, A, program designed by Adobe to recognize the top 50 marketers in the world who drive bold, fearless marketing and digital transformation.

 

Previously the CMO at Cigna Vince has founded multiple companies, including the chasing the insights academy, where he empowers entrepreneurs and business owners to [00:02:00] make sense of marketing and grow the business they have always dreamed of. Join me in welcoming vince warnock

 

Trina: So whew!, all right, this conversation is just amazing. I wanted to ask you. A couple of things we haven't gotten to either of the two things that we said we were going to talk about, but we talked to

 

Vince Warnock: them so much gold.

 

Yeah. As soon as you and I started talking, this is going to be like five hour long episode.

 

Trina: Ah, all right. So I want to pop in and talk about some of the mental health challenges that being an entrepreneur can present because and I know that one of them, which is a combination of mental health challenges is imposter syndrome.

 

And that's one of the things that I'm passionate about. And I know you are too , Vince.

 

Vince Warnock: Yeah, no, I always say imposter syndrome is my old, old friend. And yeah, for those. I'm pretty sure every entrepreneur [00:03:00] knows what imposter syndrome is, but every now and then you find some of the doesn't and it is just that feeling. Isn't it of, I don't belong here. I don't deserve what this is and people are gonna find out I'm a complete, and utter fraud. They're going to find out I'm making this up as they go along. And when you grow up in a family where you don't have role models, you don't have people like anybody. Basically, when I was a kid, anyone who had success was the enemy because my parents would look at anybody that had made money and go, well, they obviously don't deserve that money.

 

We do, but we never get the opportunity, which is a really unhealthy view around money and success and

 

Trina: things.

 

I think it is quite common.

 

Sadly, I think you're right. Yeah. But it was, it was really difficult growing up in there. And I had to break through that myself. And as a result, anytime that you succeed, you feel like you don't belong there.

 

I feel like I'm an imposter of these scenarios. And I remember early on I, I was I was quite young back in the day, as my son says, when it's black and white, you know? But I went to, I went to gets to this business breakfast and they had one of the heads of Adobe speaking, there, for Oceania [00:04:00] and, and he was going to be talking about his journey and how success comes, all this kind of stuff.

 

And I'm like, oh my goodness , first of all, I had no money. Right. I was real young businessperson. I had no money whatsoever. So I'm going somewhere with this free food and free drink. I'm like, yes, sign me up. I'm going to eat and drink everything, but also get to hear from this legend. And I'm like, right. So I knew if I'm going to this business breakfast I'm going to have to dress up.

 

I didn't own a suit. I, in fact, basically. Jeans or track pants and a t-shirt was pretty much all I ever owned. So I went down to a Goodwill shop and down to a secondhand shop and I found a suit there for $10. It was disgusting. It was gray. Like this light shiny gray, it was double breasts. I had no idea what fashion was back then.

 

Um, my daughter would argue, I still don't. So I bought this suit there. It was ill fitting. Like honestly, the sleeves went down to my lower knuckles. It was, it was horrible. And I had a long hair at the time, which I turned up at, tied up in a ponytail. So nothing about this scream, success or, or fashion or anything whatsoever.

 

But I turned up at the [00:05:00] Event and the second I walked down and I went, what am I doing here? I stand out like a sore thumb. I don't belong here. Everybody else looks like they do belong here. I sat at this table that were allocated for, I got my food and everything, and I was enjoying the food and I thought, you know what, screw it.

 

I'm just going to enjoy the food. And obviously this is not for me, but you know, I'm going to do this. And I remember looking around the table and in my mind, like picture it right now. It just looks like everybody's wearing Armani suits or Tom Fords. Everyone looked distinguished and I'm here in this tacky, shiny gray piece of crap.

 

So I'm like, no. So I felt like a complete outsider. And anyway, the speaker got up and he shared his journey and, oh my goodness. It was inspiring. Like really was. And I just loved it. I'm like, I want to be the sky I want to, I want his life. Why can't I have that? There's a new company, cars a brand new Audi and this is way back then, and I was just like, oh man. And at the end of his presentation, he went around to every table and he asked the same question, which has, have you got any questions? And I heard him a couple tables away and I'm like, right. And I remember this, I can still picture it. This conversation right [00:06:00] here. My brain goes, OK, Vinny,, listen up.

 

You have a one shot man. One shot to ask something intelligent to at least like, look like you're partially belong here. And then we got one shot. You got one shot. That's don't let me down. I won't let you down. I will leave that. Okay. Yeah. I turned around and realize he's standing right next to me. And he goes, have you got any questions?

 

And then my mouth does this thing where I just speak words. And then my brain kicks in afterwards and I just went, oh, at what point did you know, you'd made it? And my brain just went you moron. And I looked around the table and there's a lot of people rolling their eyes, like, amateur question.

 

And I was like, ah, damn it. And he just turned around and he shocked me. Just said, actually, that's a very good question. Knowing what my brain was like, walking out the door, just went, wait, what? Come back. And he said, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. And the moment you hear that from someone successful.

 

You're like, if I'm hearing a secret from someone successful, I'm writing this stuff down. So I grabbed my peanut paper and he told me, he goes, I've got this morning routine. I go through events and I'm like, I've heard that morning routines are really important. So I started writing down every word out of his mouth.

 

He gets [00:07:00] every morning I get up deliberately early and I'm like, Ooh, I like this deliberately early. And he says, ah, I get out of bed. And I go to the bathroom. I said, interesting, not the kitchen straight to the bathroom. Gotcha. And he goes, I fill up the sink with cold water and I'm like, Hmm. So I ask him what temperature exactly is already in cold water.

 

Yes. Yeah. And I fill out the single cold water. I splashed that water on my face. I look in the mirror and I go, ha today's the day they find out you're a fraud. And I went, what? And he goes, I've never felt like a success. I've never felt like I fit in that's. He said most of us, he indicated around the table.

 

He said, most of us feel the exact same. And I looked at these people that I felt like I didn't belong with a lot of the, all these people that I was looking up to essentially at this table. And they're all nodding as well. And I was like, oh my goodness. And that's when I realized a couple of things.

 

First of all, we're all as much of a hot mess as each other. And I realized that I had judged all these people as being these perfect business people, these like super successful people, but all of them [00:08:00] felt like they didn't belong. What's up with that. And that made me also realize that actually exposing that thinking really helped me, but also, I mean, I had as much right to be at that table as everybody else.

 

Um, now I'd love to say that that kind of cured imposter syndrome and everything. Obviously I struggled with that for the rest of my career. Even when I published my first book Trina, that was the emotional roller coaster I was talking about was I should've felt amazing publishing that book. Right.

 

Vince Warnock: I poured my heart and soul and sweat and blood into that book.

 

Trina: How'd you feel, instead?

 

Vince Warnock: I was depressed. Because I went to the book launch, everyone said, don't do a book launch. I'm like, oh, I'm a Marketer, hold my beer. So went into this book, launch, got a hundred people there to sign copies. It was an amazing atmosphere. It was a beautiful event.

 

Everyone was so supportive, but people kept telling me I can't wait to read the book and that stage. Yeah. And I felt very vulnerable and very exposed. And

 

I really,

 

Trina: You write a book, then think...Oh shit, they might read it.

 

Vince Warnock: I know, I know. I know. So I went to bed that night. I should have been, cause I'm a high extrovert when I'm around that many [00:09:00] people, I should be buzzing all night, but no, I was, I couldn't sleep in the bad way.

 

And I had these conversations going over and over my head saying, who do you think you are? What makes you think you have the right to write about what makes you think anyone wants to read this rubbish ? In fact, they're going to read it and think what an amateur. So in the morning I made a dumb decision.

 

I decided that I was going to sabotage myself. Because I had lined up interviews with Forbes, with CIO magazine Diginomica they all wanted to profile me in my book and I'm like, ah, so I contact them all and said, look, super appreciate it. But I'm way too busy at the moment, which was a lie I could have made it.

 

I was really busy, but I could have made the time for this. And I went back, I didn't talk about it on social. I turned down any press. I just didn't want to talk about my book anymore. And it wasn't until I got called out by one of my mentors. And he's the type of mentor by the way that he doesn't call you. You've got to book time with him. But he called me out of the blue and he said, look, I'm just checking in on you. How's the book sales going? I told him, he was like, oh, okay, good numbers. But I haven't seen [00:10:00] anything at the events. Like you've gone down, there's no social posts.

 

It's no press what's going on. And I said, oh, you know, it's all good. I'm just relying on word of mouth. Cause I'm so busy. And he goes, yeah, No he called me out, but he said to me like, now this is a guy, by the way, who's an eight times best-selling author and I'm not doing an Amazon business. I'm talking New York times bestselling author.

 

Right. Every book he puts out there just goes ballistic. And I've, I've really, really like this. Guy's a legend. And he, he said to me, I'm going to tell you the process. I go through every single time I publish a book and I'm like, oh, okay. And then you just relayed my story back to me the same, self-doubt the same Imposter syndrome, the same everything I'm getting, but that doesn't make sense.

 

Cause you're so successful. And he goes, I never feel like I'm successful. And that's when I realized that talking about this as really, really important, this is why I'm writing a book on it at the moment is actually the more we talk about an imposter and the more we shine light on it, more we realize something and that's something.

 

 

Why Imposter Syndrom isn't a "Bad" thing...

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Vince Warnock: That it's not actually a bad thing. And this is a crazy thought, but bear with me when I say this imposter [00:11:00] syndrome in itself, isn't actually bad. If you look at what it is, all it is is your brain going, Hey Trina, Hey Vince, Hey listeners. You're outside of your comfort zone right now. You're in fact, you're way out of your comfort zone and I want to keep you safe.

 

So I'm going to use fear to get you come running back to me so I can wrap you up in my arms and keep you nice and comfy and cozy. Now the problem with that is we're entrepreneurs. You know, when we talk about the fact that we're worried that we're making this up as, we go along, guess what? We are making them up as we go along, this is exactly what we should be doing.

 

We should be out of our comfort zone.

 

Trina: Oh my God. I absolutely love this. And it is absolutely true. We are a little bit of the imposter because we're making, we're creating something that hasn't been created before.

 

Vince Warnock: And that's a good thing. Yeah. But we don't get breakthrough in your comfort zone. You don't get success and prosperity and your comfort zone, you get it outside of there.

 

So when you can recognize that, that's when that's, when something interesting happens, because you realize that imposter syndrome itself is just a bunch of signals from your brain to [00:12:00] say, you're outside of your comfort zone. So in other words, it's your brain go, Hey, guess what? You're exactly where you need to be.

 

Well done, and you get to choose what to do, what you want with that information. So you can either choose to do what I did, which is sabotage myself and go, okay, I'm going to run from those feelings or you get to reframe it and go, you know what brain really appreciate you. I appreciate you telling me I'm exactly where I need to be.

 

I know you worried about this, but you know what? I've got this I'm good at this. It's okay. So hi, honestly, imposter syndrome strikes every entrepreneur, unless you're a sociopath and then you're probably okay.

 

Trina: Or very new. I remember being very new and just not knowing. Wasn't I'm using air quotes, listeners, what isn't supposed to be possible, and I'm going to do, and people saying it's not possible.

 

It's like, but I'm doing it. It's actually happening. I wasn't already, pre-programmed pre programmed that it wasn't [00:13:00] supposed to get done. And so then you get some more experience under the belt and you realize that, Hey, there's this entrepreneurial thing and I can do it. And, but now, you know, The trip wires and the falls and the, and the scary things and what could actually happen if you fail and then what could possibly happen if you succeed.

 

And that's scary too.

 

Vince Warnock: Well, you know what it's like? Cause I was talking about this concept of curiosity, which is one of the superpowers of every entrepreneur. But we are born curious, we're born without limits. If you think about it, right when we were a kid and anyone who's a parent knows this, every question when you get, why, why, why, why, why until you like, ah, because I said so, but they born naturally curious the problem with it is if we get it beaten out of us and what, by that, I mean, we get to the point where we go. If I ask a question about that, someone's going to judge me on that. Think you probably should know that by now or someone's going to go, why you dumb?

 

Trina: And they're going to ask that question because either they don't know [00:14:00] themselves and they can't answer the question or they're intimidated because. They have their own fears. They have their own lack of understanding of how important they are or how valuable they are.

 

Vince Warnock: I said, I still remember Trina. So I used to work at a not-for-profit called education in New Zealand and the government looked at it and went, Hey, you guys are just smashing it with all the money we give you, but we've got these government departments that are failing with the money we give them.

 

So we're going to, we're going to bind you all together and create what's called a crown agency, which is a new government department here. And I'm like, wait, I now work for government. Oh man. But we're bringing these companies together and we didn't have an IT person there, but I was the person who knew how to turn on the computer.

 

So even though I'm the marketing guy, I was also the proxy IT guy. So I'm sitting in this room for these super nerdy IT people, and I'm a nerd myself. But they were talking about these systems and these things that we need to set up in a new environment because we've got a new building, we've got to bring all the computers in and they were talking about this SRB, [00:15:00] something, something, something system.

 

And I'm, I'm no idea what that is. So I asked the question, I said, oh, sorry, can someone explain to me what the SRB system is? You all keep saying, we need this, but I don't know what it actually does. And around the room that everybody did the same thing. They'll roll their eyes and go, oh, like you don't know.

 

And I'm like, I'm sorry, guys. I didn't grow up in your environment. You know, I'm, I'm actually a marketing guy. I'm fulfilling this roles. I'm here, as part of this. So you're going to have to work with me here. Just, I know I'm dumb around this, but, and they were like, oh, well, let's see.

 

So what does it actually do? Art? It's hard to explain. Well, humor me explain it, no, not a single person and funniest part of it. It was something that this project group for the last 10 years, every time they set up a new agency or set up a new thing, we're bringing the system with it because obviously we need to pay for that.

 

We need to bring it on board, but no one had actually used it for the last 10 years. They were just implementing it to all these organizations and it had no function, but no one knew that. And nobody questioned it. Took it dumb, guy coming in there going, I don't know what I'm doing then, then. [00:16:00] Maybe we don't actually need this.

 

So, oh, it was the best feeling ever. Honestly,

 

Trina: the curiosity, the beginner's mind because frequently we have our habits of acting our habits of believing. This is what has always been done in business or what has always been done in my life. This is how I've always done it.

 

That's not a good enough answer anymore. Especially not if you want something different than what you already have.

 

Vince Warnock: Yeah. Oh, you've just got to get curious honestly, and not just in business as well. I genuinely do believe. That if we can get curious in every aspect of our life, we're just going to become better people.

 

And if you look at, I mean, the world's a mess in the moment. If we get really honest about it, the world's a mess. You got pandemics everywhere. You've got, political and social divides. You've got people who don't want to talk to others. But if we got really curious and tried to understand people, try to ask questions that would normally embarrass ourselves.

 

Like, I don't understand why that is, please explain then honestly, you will [00:17:00] start to grow as an individual. And I, I remember this is something that from my childhood where, so growing up in an abusive house, School for me was a happy place, right? So it was a place where I was always, I was safe until I got to that age 11.

 

It was quite a pivotal year for me. Then I went to a transitional school. It's called an intermediate, which has just two years, 11 and 12, before you go off to high school. And I'm at this intermediate and I encountered something in the classroom that I've never come across before, other than at home.

 

And that was a bully. And this guy made my life hell for two years, I had no safe space anymore. I was tormented at home. I was tormented at school. I was, I didn't even want to exist. I thought it was an alien for a long time. I thought somehow someone's going to come and rescue me and take me off the stupid planet.

 

It was horrible. But then when I got to age , 12 were in their last year intermediate or found out that he was going to a different high school and I'm like, yes, I am free. So I went to mine, he went to his, there was all good. Never had to see him again in my life, but also realize I was sick of being a victim.

 

And I was [00:18:00] sick of people being able to take advantage of me. So I threw myself into learning how to box and handling, learning how to do martial arts and do that for a number of years. And I would train every single day. And I wasn't, I wouldn't say I'm any good at it, but enough to be able to defend myself.

 

Definitely. Yeah. And age I think it was just about 17 I'm at school and I found out he got transferred back to my school. And I'm like, oh my goodness. I had seen every eighties movie. I'd seen all the revenge of the nerds, all these things about the underdog. Finally coming out on top of like, this is going to be a glorious day.

 

I could play it out of my head. I knew what was going to happen and sure enough, he walks past me and I'm like, so I yelled his name and a few expletives and I knew what was going to happen. He turned around, he took a swing at me and I'm like nope to another swing at me I'm like "Ha, ha, ha!", and then finally I laid him out.

 

I, and I'm not a violent person at all. In fact, I abhore violence, but I hit him, knocked him out. He was on the ground unconscious. And this moment where the underdog finally came down on top of him, like, yes, except I felt terrible. [00:19:00] Yeah. And I remember suddenly finding myself in the principal's office, which funny enough is what happened when you fight

 

and I'm there with the principal and he turns to me and he said, look, do you know why he got transferred to the school? And I said, no, I don't care. I'm trying to be all staunch. You know, I'm not very good staunch person, "I don't care". And he goes, well, you probably should care. I mean, oh. And he said he started explaining this, this guy's back story in his life.

 

And he said, look, he grew up in an abusive household, I'm thinking Yeah same. So what, he goes so much so that his dad used to beat him, his mum and his sister every day, since he was a baby. And recently what happened was the father beat the mother so badly in front of the two children that she actually passed away.

 

So he murdered the mom in front of the two of them now, rightfully he got arrested and he went to jail, which is great. And they went to stay with an auntie and uncle and their, and the auntie and uncle were closer to our school. And that's when he got transferred there. And I was like, but I didn't know that.

 

And he goes, no. And I wouldn't expect you to know that Vince, he goes, but funny enough of all the people that I thought might [00:20:00] understand what he went through. And all the people that might've been able to actually talk to them about that you were the one. And that's when I had this big revelation that I'm not the hero in the story.

 

I'm not the underdog coming out on top. And by the way, all those eighties movies lied to us. Like they are horrible movies. But an extra fact, I'm the villain of this story because I'm the one person that had the opportunity now, not, I'm not saying I would have turned his life around anything.

 

He may not have chosen to talk to me about these things, but I had the opportunity to be there for him. If I had taken the time to try and understand why he behaves the way he does, why he was doing what he does. And that's when I realized we just have to understand each other, we have to get super curious and in doing so, by the way, your businesses will grow, your connections will grow.

 

You will understand people a lot more deeply. You understand yourself more deeply. You'll just be a better human being. So we just have to do that.

 

Trina: Amen and amen, Vince, you're speaking, you're speaking the truth.[00:21:00]

 

When you work on yourself, when you know why, when you go into the depths and you understand yourself more and how you respond and know that you're safe, you have the ability to be curious and to ask and to stop mind reading, because it's not mind reading, you're actually putting thoughts into your, putting your thoughts and your thinking.

 

Other people are thinking your thoughts and they're not, and, and when we to pull it back to imposter syndrome, I think we often go into a room or an environment or a niche thinking everybody already knows what we know. And we know such a small portion of. Yep. When instead what it, we know we have like this vast well of knowledge and we know a little bit about everything and everybody knows a little bit about what we [00:22:00] have, but there's the magic that, that you bring to your industry, whatever that is.

 

Vince Warnock: I'll tell you something I found interesting, Trina. So getting recognized by Adobe as one of the top 50 marketers is an interesting thing. When you suffer from imposter syndrome, by the way, because I'm sitting there again, I could list, I could run a list of a hundred people, more talented than me. What are you on about?

 

And then they, so how it kind of played out was Adobe had this big conference, they asked me to speak at it and I said, yep. So they're going to fly me to San Francisco business class, five star hotel, all the whole shebang. And I went, No, I can't do that. I'll come and speak at your conference, but I'll pay my own way because I was chief marketing officer.

 

I didn't want anyone to think there's conflict of interest. Luckily Cigna found out about it and they're like, this is a massive opportunity. We'll pay for it. I'm like, yes, back to business class. I couldn't justify it otherwise. Yeah. They adamant with me. You have to come and speak at this conference.

 

I'm like, yeah. Okay, chill. I'm going to be there. So finally I get over to this conference and they, the way they structured it, they had 25 keynotes plus what they call celebrity [00:23:00] keynotes. So the celebrities were like Jamie Fox. They had. Flo rider, some Olympic athletes, and this is amazing. You get to hobnob with all these people.

 

It's like, this is awesome. Every one of my heroes, I realize those 25 keynotes I'm to me, I'm the one that stands out here. I'm the, I'm the sore thumb, because I had Brian solace and Henry I think Seth Goden was it. Incredible speakers. I'm like, this is going to be awesome. I get to hear them all. And then we got there and then they turned around that day, they opened up the conference and then the CEO came out and he's like, welcome to the conference, blah blah.

 

And he said, we've got a very special thing that we're launching here because there's, there's a reason that we've got these 25 people as the keynotes. And I'm like, huh. And he goes, because these are part of our new program where we recognize the top 50 marketers in the world. We've chosen the top 25 of those, but I'm like, oh, there must be 25.

 

And me and I really, my brain did not cope. It really didn't cope with this very well at all. I was really, I was struggling with this whole concept, but then it got even worse because he goes, and I really want to highlight three of those that I think [00:24:00] are challenging the industry in the right way. And he goes in the first, it was all the way from New Zealand.

 

I'm like, oh, another Kiwi. And then suddenly I see my face on the screen. That Kiwi looks exactly like me and then my name come up, knowing what the hell he's got the same name as me. Like my brain's just disengaging, but it was because of the work I've done around morality and ethics, ethics to marketing, and actually challenging the industry to be decent custodians of care, you know, for, for people that we market to.

 

And I'm like, oh man. So some at this conference, I'm getting recognized, I'm struggling with this, but I got to go out to dinner with all of my heroes. I got to hear them speak. And it was, it was better than I even thought. Like honestly, Brian solace blew my mind and handy was just one of the sweetest people ever.

 

Seth Goden, anytime you get to hear him, he's like, yeah so I'm just like, this is incredible. And I've got to go out to dinner with these people. And the more that you start talking to them, the more you start drinking lots of whiskey, by the way, love my whiskey also found that Americans I'm sorry, but Americans, a lightweight drinkers compared to Kiwis, putting it out there.

 

We can drink all the top shelf stuff and you guys are on the floor, [00:25:00] sucking the air again.

 

But the more, the more we were, well, we were getting into this center. It was just such a wonderful time. Some of the sweetest people ever, but they started opening up about their problems. And when they start talking about relationships, falling apart, struggling, financially, all these kinds of things were coming out and I'm going, but these are the people I look up to.

 

These are the people that I want to be. And weirdly they're as much of a hot mess as I am. And that's what I realized. None of us are really that different. All of us are dealing with things. All of us have our own struggles and our own stuff. So why don't we just actually try and support each other? Why don't we talk about this kind of stuff?

 

Why don't we be honest about I had this with a peer of mine in the UK. She was really struggling. At one point, she went kind of dark on me and I'm like, Hey, hang on, jump on zoom. She's not up to zoom. Haven't done my hair and makeup , and I'm like ha! Neither have I..

 

So I finally got her on a zoom call and she just burst into tears and said, look, I'm just really ashamed. I'm really embarrassed. I've been asked to put together this [00:26:00] this press release for Forbes. I've been asked to put together this quote for the slash corporate over here, but I procrastinated so much on both of those because I was overwhelmed that now I'm at the point where I'm really embarrassed and really ashamed.

 

And so I'm avoiding all of the calls. I'm avoiding all of their emails. And I was like, oh man, I did that last week. And she was like, what I said, yeah, that happens to me all the time. But you know, I'm not surprised. And then we realized that by talking about it with each other, we remove the shame from it.

 

We removed our assessment and we realize, hang on a minute, this can't be then uncommon. So we started asking other entrepreneurs and sure. Just about everybody started with struggles with the same thing, but we don't talk about it because of that embarrassment. So yeah, we're all,

 

that was one of the questions that I was going to bring up eventually was because all of my questions have gone out the window.

 

The conversation has been amazing. But absolutely imposter syndrome that the guilt for. Stepping away from what isn't working for you, [00:27:00] the embarrassment is like, you know, this, isn't making me happy and how does this, how dare this, where I am not make me happy, look at where I am. Anybody else who would be here would be thrilled.

 

And if I gave this up, people would think I'm crazy. And then getting to the point of, being recognized or something and like thinking I, I can't even go forward with this and finding subtle ways to self-sabotage and not asking for help. I think this is a common thing. For pretty much everyone who has a certain degree of success.

 

Yeah. You know, can I ask for help? Because if I ask for help, that means I'm not successful or that means that has some kind of story.

 

Yeah, we totally need to reframe that though, because, and I know, you know this as well, but yeah, it's this weird mentality we have that if we, if we asked for help, we're failing or if we ask for help, then you know, we can't do an actual fact.

 

I'll tell you now. And this is the weird [00:28:00] thing. So I always talk to people about getting a coach and yes, I'm biased because I am a coach and you're some awesome ones. So if you want one, Hey, you know, but the fact is everybody should, every business, every entrepreneur or business person should have a coach.

 

And the reason is because guess what? All of the top coaches have coaches all the top entrepreneurs have coaches are. Yeah, exactly. Richard Branson has multiple coaches. I know for a fact, I know that Russell Brunson, he's got his own ones, I'm trying to think about the high profile names.

 

I know Seth Godin has at least two mentors and two coaches that speak into his life. There's all these people that have. All the support. And yet we think if we do that for ourselves, it makes us less, or it takes away from us the best entrepreneurs, the most successful people surround themselves with those that can help and ask for that help, which means we need to reframe asking from help, asking for help is weakness or failure.

 

And actually as a success, in fact, we should be asking for it more often and getting advice more often as well.

 

I agree. [00:29:00] I agree. Nobody has nobody is an island. It was a cliche. When you look at the most successful people, they did not do it. Yeah, they may have been the figurehead, but they did not do it alone.

 

Yeah. And, and having those people speak India as well as really important because I mean the civil multiple purposes, I, I, so I have two coaches and I have an accountability coach and I've got four peer coaches where we coach each other and help each other out. And honestly, that's probably the best relationships of all, because you get to send a quick message going.

 

And they're like, quick jump on zoom. I remember doing that. I had a summit where one of my VAs just went Mia, like honestly, and just lift me in the lurch. And I had to do everything myself while trying to move house into this place while also preparing for a wedding for a friend of ours, all this stuff and, and watching my group program.

 

So all of this happening at the same time, and I had to fulfill their roles. Couldn't just hand it over to someone straight away, the whole policy stuff behind it. And I was just like, oh my goodness, this, this is not, [00:30:00] this is nuts. And I hit the wall one night where I had to get this email out and I was trying to, trying to think of the wording.

 

And I just went by. And I just seen it. So is to one of my peer coaches and just said help. And she's like, what's up? And I said, I'm trying to wipe words, English not good, tired out. Now she goes, jump on zoom. And we co-wrote that. And I tell you now she didn't look at me as a failure at all. She didn't look at me and go, oh, I can't believe that's going to do this.

 

She was like, I'm so glad I got to help. I'm so glad I got to be part of this as well. And then I returned the favor. I see many times where as well, but it's that whole thing of, I surround myself with these people and I can tell you now I wouldn't be where I am. If I didn't have these people surrounding me, because they will, they will encourage you when you hit the wall and you're going to hit the wall a lot.

 

You're an entrepreneur. That means you have days where you're crushing it. And days where you're like, I can't get out of bed. These are the people that get you out, be in a case, they remind you why you're doing what you're doing, but they also see your blind spots. They see the areas that you don't even know are problematic and they call you [00:31:00] out on that.

 

And they bolster the areas where you're weaker as well. And more than that, they're just become ridiculous friends. So just got to do it anyway.

 

Trina: Yeah. Well, yeah, it's the power of community and creating your own community, creating your own little mastermind. That's beautiful. Yeah. Listeners, if you don't have a community of peers who are on the same journey in some degree or another, I encourage you to find one.

 

I know that I've had made the biggest growth as when being part of a community when I'm surrounded by people who are on a similar journey, because family, friends, strangers on Facebook, that they do not understand what you're going through, what you're experiencing, what your struggles are. And when you have those peers, you can just say a few words [00:32:00] and they will know exactly where you're coming from and be able to support you.

 

And you will be able to do the same for

 

Vince Warnock: them. Definitely. It's super important. And it's funny because family and friends is a really good example of it. They mean? Well, like family and friends. Yeah, yeah, exactly. But the thing is they can't see your vision. They've never been where you're going. And this is why you get people that have been where you're going, you know, because they were, their thing is I want to protect you.

 

So therefore, that's never going to work. What are you doing? Come on trainer. You're never going to be successful if you do that,

 

Trina: your inner critic on the outside of your body.

 

Vince Warnock: Yeah, exactly. So you want to surround yourself with people that have been there, done that and go TriNet. You're on the right track.

 

Please keep doing.

 

Trina: Yeah. Awesome. Yeah. And for the family, just tell them it's going to be okay.

 

Vince Warnock: I got this. Yeah, I got this. I know what I'm doing. Yeah. Or come and talk to me when you've done this before one doesn't go down well at dinner parties.

 

Trina: Well, [00:33:00] Vince, this has been an absolute pleasure. You mentioned during our conversation that you have at least what four new books coming out.

 

Vince Warnock: Yes. I've got two new books coming out in December and as well as republishing my first book, because I made some changes to it. And then two other books which are going to be published in January and then another two by the end of 20, 22 and two children's books as well. Cause I love just the cheesy dad jokes that are in there

 

Trina: Vince, this conversation we could go on for hours, but I want to respect your time.

 

And would you be willing to come back for another interview? At some point,

 

Vince Warnock: Ahhh, let me

 

think about that for more than two seconds. Of course I would come on, any time with you Trina is devine..

 

Trina: Fantastic. Because it's an absolute pleasure. There's nothing but gold that happens during our conversations. [00:34:00] And it's been that way from the very beginning, which was not that long. And I expect it to continue. So this has been an absolute pleasure having you. How can people find out more about you, Vince?

 

Oh, man, I made this so complex, nasty marketing expert. Exactly. Just go to Chasingtheinsights.com. You'll see a few things on their pages. Obviously the home of my podcast and that's the home of my books.

 

But you'll see on there, two things really important. One. I link to all my social networks. So just connect with me everywhere, unless you're a spammer, don't connect with me if you're a spammer. Cause I don't like that, but everybody else feel free to reach out to me. But also you'll see a link to where you can book a free strategy call with me.

 

If you have any area of marketing where you're really struggling or imposter syndrome or anything like that. And just book some time with me, they are no obligation whatsoever. In fact, like I said, nine times out of 10, I'm going to forget to tell you about what I do anyway. So it's really just there to serve you.

 

Vince Warnock: I'm on a massive mission Trina. Help as many entrepreneurs as I possibly can. I [00:35:00] just think it's a high calling. I think it's something that's really special as the backbone of our economy and entrepreneurs of just bad ass. Awesome individuals. Yeah.

 

That's a beautiful end listeners. Those links will be in the show notes.

 

Thank you again, Vince. It has been an absolute pleasure and honor to have this conversation with you.

 

I see. We just have to do this again and this time we'll bring, I'll bring some whiskey and we'll make them out of it. Yeah. Sounds good. Yeah.

 

 

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next week. I'll be talking again with Willow Sana. A self-employed creative for over 20 years and sought after business coach who empowers visionary entrepreneurs with heart-centered action. About what you need to do before you can show up powerfully and compassionately for others. It's going to be a fantastic episode so tune in next week folks you don't want to miss it

 

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