Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejui- shut up. Don't say it girly. Yeah, he's kinda hot in that dirty way, but he's gonna ruin your life. He's gonna try to kill your dad and force you into marriage. Does it sound like a dark romance plot? A little. But trust us, we're But Scientist and can tell you that with 100% certainty, Emo Michael Keaton isn't worth it. Stick with the adorable weirdo (Alec Baldwin) and his tiny town replica. But, like, still keep an eye on that. If this recap teaches you anything, it should be that even the quiet ones can be crazy ones.