The Divorced Muslim Dad Podcast 🐻
60 episodes - English - Latest episode: 8 months ago - ★★★★★ - 3 ratingsMarried at 24. Divorced at 34. 2 kids and yeah the whole second gen immigrant Muslim living in the west thing. This podcast series is about faith, relationships and parenthood. Sometimes I tell my story and sometime I speak with interesting people. 🤓
Sporadic episodes...as and when but always from the heart ❤️
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Episodes
S2:Ep11 - Fathers Matter 👨👦🫶 w/ Nav Mirza (Founder of Dads Unlimited)
September 06, 2023 15:54 - 49 minutes - 41 MBHaving gone through an acrimonious divorce in 2013 Nav Mirza was faced with something he wasn’t prepared for; legally losing access to his beloved son. Concerned for his welfare after a series of incidents he raised the alarm with the authorities but wasn’t taken seriously. The experience drove him right to the edge on more than one occasion as he felt hopeless in the face of powerful institutions that perceived him as just another disgruntled trouble making father. Eventually after many year...
S2:Ep10 - A Happy Divorce? 🕊️☮️ w/ Salma Khan (The Divorce Coach)
August 10, 2023 08:12 - 57 minutes - 44.3 MBYou’ve the heard terrible stories about people going through divorce right? You know the ones about two otherwise sane individuals completely losing their minds as they wrestle with the aftermath of a failed relationship. Every story is desperately sad and made even worse when you hear children are being dragged in to the squabbling and family members fanning the flames. But does it have to be this way? I think we can all agree that if divorce or a break up is inevitable then its everyone’s...
S2:Ep10 - Consciously Uncoupling 🧠💔 w/ Salma Khan (The Divorce Coach)
August 10, 2023 08:12 - 57 minutes - 44.3 MBYou’ve the heard terrible stories about people going through divorce right? You know the ones about two otherwise sane individuals completely losing their minds as they wrestle with the aftermath of a failed relationship. Every story is desperately sad and made even worse when you hear children are being dragged in to the squabbling and family members fanning the flames. But does it have to be this way? I think we can all agree that if divorce or a break up is inevitable then its everyone’...
S2:Ep9 - Losing my father and finding myself 👴🌹🙋♂️ w/ Naushad Qayyum (Mental Health campaigner)
March 22, 2023 17:50 - 55 minutes - 44.2 MBSalams and Ramadan mubarak! The conversation you’re about to listen to is with Naushad Qayyum; a highly qualified experienced teacher and international educator turned advocate and campaigner for men’s mental health amongst south asain men. Naushads story is incredible to listen to and covers many themes related to faith and relationships. You see Naushad’s world was turned upside one fateful day in 2018 when his father unexpectedly passed away. Losing a parent is difficult to reconcile at t...
S2 Ep8: Rewriting the script of your life 📝 🧠 w/ Will Daniel-Braham (Therapist)
February 27, 2023 19:37 - 1 hour - 50 MBIt’s clear now that our experiences in childhood shape our beliefs that in turn determine the decisions we make about how we live our lives. But what if you don’t like the script you’ve been given? Is it possible to change it and lead a more intentional life and one that’s aligned with the person you want to be? Well to find out the answers to these questions and more I’ve been speaking with Will Daniel-Braham; a therapist, coach and trainer in the field of personal and organisational develo...
S2 Ep8: Rewriting the script of your life 📝 🧠 w/ Therapist Will Daniel-Braham
February 27, 2023 19:37 - 1 hour - 50 MBIt’s clear now that our experiences in childhood shape our beliefs that in turn determine the decisions we make about how we live our lives. But what if you don’t like the script you’ve been given? Is it possible to change it and lead a more intentional life and one that’s aligned with the person you want to be? Well to find out the answers to these questions and more I’ve been speaking with Will Daniel-Braham; a therapist, coach and trainer in the field of personal and organisational develo...
S2:Ep8 - Rewriting the script of your life 📝 🧠 w/ Will Daniel-Braham (Therapist)
February 27, 2023 19:37 - 1 hour - 50 MBIt’s clear now that our experiences in childhood shape our beliefs that in turn determine the decisions we make about how we live our lives. But what if you don’t like the script you’ve been given? Is it possible to change it and lead a more intentional life and one that’s aligned with the person you want to be? Well to find out the answers to these questions and more I’ve been speaking with Will Daniel-Braham; a therapist, coach and trainer in the field of personal and organisational develo...
S2:Ep7 - Resilience: The Only Way Is Up 🔝🧗♀️ w/ Alyas Karmani
August 15, 2022 13:37 - 1 hour - 51.6 MBIn this episode Alyas Karmani (activist, therapist, counsellor, imam) and I have a meandering conversation about subject of Resilience. Essentially our ability to bounce back from adversity. As usual our discussion take us to unexpected places and we revisit historical events such as apartheid in South Africa, the civil war in Sierra Leone as well as the Crusades, the Battle of Uhud and the Conquest of Mecca. You might not get all of the answers you are looking for here but thats not the poi...
BONUS EP - How addiction is impacting your relationships 😳🧐
August 06, 2022 10:55 - 19 minutes - 16.7 MBFollowing on from publishing the ‘Addiction:Just Say No’ episode I set off to take a break on an organic dairy farm in Amsterdam. Whilst sat in the idyllic dutch countryside I was finishing off Dr Gabor Mate’s book ‘In the realm of hungry ghosts: close encounters with addiction’ when I came across a section that forced me to recognise my own addictive behavioural traits and how they negatively impact the relationships in my life. In this short bonus episode I read an extract from the book d...
S2:Ep6 - Addiction: Just Say No? 💉💊 w/ Alyas Karmani
July 28, 2022 08:52 - 59 minutes - 45.3 MBIn this episode Alyas Karmani (Imam, Therapist, Activist) and I discuss the oft misunderstood psychological phenomenon of addiction. Many of us are unaware of what addiction actually is, why it happens and how its impacting our communities. Worryingly society’s attitude to addiction is leading to already traumatised vulnerable people being ostracised, neglected and plunged further into despair. In our conversation we cover a host of issues starting with what addiction is, how and why it mani...
S2:Ep6 - Addiction: Just Say No? 💉💊 w/Alyas Karmani
July 28, 2022 08:52 - 59 minutes - 45.3 MBIn this episode Alyas Karmani (Imam, Therapist, Activist) and I discuss the oft misunderstood psychological phenomenon of addiction. Many of us are unaware of what addiction actually is, why it happens and how its impacting our communities. Worryingly society’s attitude to addiction is leading to already traumatised vulnerable people being ostracised, neglected and plunged further into despair. In our conversation we cover a host of issues starting with what addiction is, how and why it mani...
S2:Ep5 - The Power of Love ❤️🔥❤️🩹 w/ Tafazal Mohammed (Coach)
July 19, 2022 12:33 - 1 hour - 60.5 MBReally excited to share this episode with you! I got to speak with Tafazal Mohammed who is an award winning professional relationship coach based in the UK. Normally my guests offer either a personal story or professional advice but here we get both. Listen to Tafazal’s incredible personal story and the events that led him to get married (for a third time) to someone totally out his context but very much in tune with his soul. You’ll here about the unconventional way he found his wife and c...
S2:Ep4 - Islam on Abortion ✅ ❌ w/ Alyas Karmani
July 05, 2022 15:32 - 58 minutes - 47.7 MBOn a road trip to Edinburgh part-time Imam and relationship councillor Alyas Karmani and I decided to discuss the potential impact of the ‘Roe vs Wade’ abortion ruling in the USA on Muslim communities living in the west and address the one question everyone seems to be asking ‘What does Islam have to say about abortion?’ Apparently, quite a lot! Comments/feedback/suggestions Email: [email protected] Tw/Insta: @moiazam
S2:Ep3 - Boys Will Be Boys 🥸😡 w/ Alyas Karmani
January 26, 2022 19:21 - 1 hour - 56.6 MBAlyas is back in the hot seat and this time he’s got a bee in his bonnet about…the Manosphere! Never heard of it? Well in short it represents an online global movement of disenfranchised men who wish to reassert there masculine identity through misogynistic rhetoric, extreme ideology and violence. Alerted by a distraught Muslim mother who felt her son was being groomed online to hate women Alyas undertook an 18 month deep dive in to the dark heart of the Manosphere. And what he found left hi...
S2:Ep2 - Dating the Divorced 😱 w/ Shemsah Farooq 🎓
October 22, 2021 22:10 - 56 minutes - 42.8 MBWhen’s the last time you changed your mind? I don’t mean about what to have for breakfast but changed your mind about a deeply held belief? Its not an easy thing to do but by challenging our assumptions we can sometimes see the world more clearly. That’s what Shemsah Farooq did by re-examining her beliefs about who she might like to marry. As a never previously married high flying professional Muslim woman she had always thought she should try to find a spouse of a similar status; but all t...
S2:Ep1 - Will your lawyer talk to God? 👨⚖️👩⚖️ w/ Sarah Khan Bashir MBE
July 29, 2021 16:16 - 2 hours - 131 MBIn this episode I speak with Sarah Khan Bashir, a Muslim lawyer based in the UK. Sarah runs SKB Law; a specialist Family Law firm providing services to the Muslim and South East Asian community. Its a fascinating meandering conversation where we shoot the breeze about: - Whether you really need to get lawyers involved when splitting up - Why Muslims are getting divorced these days - Intra-family marriage dynamics - What ‘Vata Sata’ is (?!) - Navigating the grey area between therapy and legal...
Will your lawyer talk to God? 👨⚖️👩⚖️
July 29, 2021 16:16 - 29 minutes - 27.2 MBIn this episode I speak with Sarah Khan Bashir, a Muslim lawyer based in the UK. Sarah runs SKB Law; a specialist Family Law firm providing services to the Muslim and South East Asian community. Its a fascinating meandering conversation where we shoot the breeze about: - Whether you really need to get lawyers involved when splitting up - Why Muslims are getting divorced these days - Intra-family marriage dynamics - What ‘Vata Sata’ is (?!) - Navigating the grey area between therapy and legal...
S2:E1 - Will your lawyer talk to God? 👨⚖️👩⚖️ w/ Sarah Khan Bashir MBE
July 29, 2021 16:16 - 29 minutes - 27.2 MBIn this episode I speak with Sarah Khan Bashir, a Muslim lawyer based in the UK. Sarah runs SKB Law; a specialist Family Law firm providing services to the Muslim and South East Asian community. Its a fascinating meandering conversation where we shoot the breeze about: - Whether you really need to get lawyers involved when splitting up - Why Muslims are getting divorced these days - Intra-family marriage dynamics - What ‘Vata Sata’ is (?!) - Navigating the grey area between therapy and legal...
#muzmatchisghetto: my reaction 🥸
January 12, 2021 12:46 - 19 minutes - 17.6 MBLast night #muzmatchisghetto was trending number 1 on UK Twitter. The tweets were commenting on a real-time discussion taking place on the audio sharing platform Clubhouse about the extreme experiences of some Muslim women using online dating services. What I heard was both shocking and saddening. This is my take...
Ep13: Why won’t she change? 🤷🏾♂️🤷🏽♀️ w/ Anonymous
February 04, 2020 00:05 - 24 minutes - 22.8 MBWhilst I’ve been publishing this podcast series over the last 12 months a number of listeners have emailed me about their relationship dilemmas. In this episode we hear from ‘Naeem’; a young, educated, articulate Muslim guy from India who takes his faith seriously. He’s keen to get married and has met someone Jess fallen in love with. At the beginning things are great between them but as time goes on the cracks begin to appear. Should he try to hold it together or call it off? If you want to ...
Fireside letters: Why won’t she change? 🤷🏾♂️🤷🏽♀️
February 04, 2020 00:05 - 24 minutes - 22.8 MBWhilst I’ve been publishing this podcast series over the last 12 months a number of listeners have emailed me about their relationship dilemmas. In this episode we hear from ‘Naeem’; a young, educated, articulate Muslim guy from India who takes his faith seriously. He’s keen to get married and has met someone Jess fallen in love with. At the beginning things are great between them but as time goes on the cracks begin to appear. Should he try to hold it together or call it off? If you want to ...
Ep12: A Guide to Online Dating 🤡 😇
January 05, 2020 18:55 - 1 hour - 56.5 MBI've been dating since my divorce in 2011; trying to navigate the new world of online dating whilst adhering to the tenants of my faith has been the trickiest of balancing acts. I've made a tonne of mistakes over the years meaning wasted time, money and emotional energy. Although I'm yet to find success online it hasn't made me a relationship sceptic; if anything the amazing women I've met along the way have given me hope for the future. In this episode I discuss what it was like to date afte...
Ep11: Your Emotional Maturity 🎭🤒
November 30, 2019 10:54 - 20 minutes - 19.1 MBIt's clear that the quality of our lives is determined by the quality of our relationships. If that's the case then it makes sense to assess how we behave with people we care about; especially when they act in a way we find hurtful. Is our reponse constructive or destructive? Do we seek to engage and resolve or hide away? Are we prepared to be honest, brave and vulnerable? In this short but essential episode you'll find out how to assess your own level of emotional maturity and why emba...
Insights: A Spiritual Awakening 💆♀️💆♂️
November 03, 2019 13:52 - 1 hour - 61.8 MBGood looks? Check. Great job? Check. Good Muslim? Check. Shared interests? Check. Great family? Check? Emotionaly healthy? Check. Now if you manage to find someone to marry that ticks all these boxes then you've hit the jackpot right? Well not necessarily. There's another dimension you really should consider that's absolutely crucial; spiritual compatability. In this episode of Insights Alyas and I discuss what 'spirtual compatability' is, how it should manifest in a marriage, how it differ...
Insights: A Spiritual Awakening 💆♀️💆♂️ w/ Alyas Karmani
November 03, 2019 13:52 - 1 hour - 61.8 MBGood looks? Check. Great job? Check. Good Muslim? Check. Shared interests? Check. Great family? Check? Emotionaly healthy? Check. Now if you manage to find someone to marry that ticks all these boxes then you've hit the jackpot right? Well not necessarily. There's another dimension you really should consider that's absolutely crucial; spiritual compatability. In this episode of Insights Alyas and I discuss what 'spirtual compatability' is, how it should manifest in a marriage, how it differ...
Ep10 - I'm Getting Divorced 🧔🏽💔🧕🏻
October 21, 2019 22:43 - 48 minutes - 45.2 MBIt's taken a bit longer than expected but in this episode I'm finally talking about my divorce: how we went about it, the emotional journey I've undertaken and some of the lessons I've learned. You'll also hear why I believe emotional compatibility between couples is more important than having common interests, why you're probably wasting your time looking for a soulmate and why 'til death do us part' is highly unlikely. This one's probably best listened to when you have done quiet time to yo...
Ep10: I'm Getting Divorced 🧔🏽💔🧕🏻
October 21, 2019 22:43 - 48 minutes - 45.2 MBIt's taken a bit longer than expected but in this episode I'm finally talking about my divorce: how we went about it, the emotional journey I've undertaken and some of the lessons I've learned. You'll also hear why I believe emotional compatibility between couples is more important than having common interests, why you're probably wasting your time looking for a soulmate and why 'til death do us part' is highly unlikely. This one's probably best listened to when you have done quiet time to yo...
In Conversation: Finding Love After Divorce 💔💘
September 27, 2019 22:21 - 48 minutes - 44.5 MBTariq is a dear friend; someone I've known for over 20 years. He married in 1996 and 16 years and 4 kids later he experienced the anguish of a painful divorce. Remarkably only 12 months later he found love again in a far away land. As someone who has been single after divorce for many years I wanted to hear first hand how he overcame the heartache and trauma and how he was able to find the capacity to love again. I thought I knew everything about Tariq's story but whilst recording this episod...
Ep9: Finding Love After Divorce 💔💘 w/ Tariq Rasul
September 27, 2019 22:21 - 48 minutes - 44.5 MBTariq is a dear friend; someone I've known for over 20 years. He married in 1996 and 16 years and 4 kids later he experienced the anguish of a painful divorce. Remarkably only 12 months later he found love again in a far away land. As someone who has been single after divorce for many years I wanted to hear first hand how he overcame the heartache and trauma and how he was able to find the capacity to love again. I thought I knew everything about Tariq's story but whilst recording this episod...
Insights: The Wedding Night 😏💋 w/ Alyas Karmani
September 08, 2019 15:48 - 47 minutes - 43.9 MBA newly married couples first experience of intimacy togther is a critical moment that sets the tone for the immediate and perhaps long term future of a relationship. In this episode Alyas Karmani (imam, psychologist, sex therapist) and I speak candidly about intimacy problems Muslim couples experience, the increasing prevalence of psychosexual disfunction, the impact of pornography on sexualities health and the path to a happy sex life. It's a frank and open episode so if you're of a sensiti...
Insights: The Wedding Night 😏💋
September 08, 2019 15:48 - 47 minutes - 43.9 MBA newly married couples first experience of intimacy togther is a critical moment that sets the tone for the immediate and perhaps long term future of a relationship. In this episode Alyas Karmani (imam, psychologist, sex therapist) and I speak candidly about intimacy problems Muslim couples experience, the increasing prevalence of psychosexual disfunction, the impact of pornography on sexualities health and the path to a happy sex life. It's a frank and open episode so if you're of a sensiti...
Ep9: Muslim Dad Syndrome 🕺🏽👳🏽♂️
August 21, 2019 09:26 - 1 hour - 69.1 MBBecoming a father is straight forward. Being a dad is not. Add to the mix the desire to bring up your children as Muslims at a time when Islam is under the spotlight doesn't lighten the load. In this episode I talk about my experience of becoming a father and my sometimes painful transition to embracing parenthood. I talk about helping my kids to forge their Islamic identity in a hostile environment, the difference between managing kids and parenting and why living your life through your kids...
Ep8: Muslim Dad Syndrome 🕺🏽👳🏽♂️
August 21, 2019 09:26 - 1 hour - 69.1 MBBecoming a father is straight forward. Being a dad is not. Add to the mix the desire to bring up your children as Muslims at a time when Islam is under the spotlight doesn't lighten the load. In this episode I talk about my experience of becoming a father and my sometimes painful transition to embracing parenthood. I talk about helping my kids to forge their Islamic identity in a hostile environment, the difference between managing kids and parenting and why living your life through your kids...
Insights: Demanding Women 🧕💪 w/ Alyas Karmani
July 21, 2019 22:10 - 55 minutes - 51.6 MBIt's summertime here in the UK and that means one thing...wall to wall weddings! You just can't move for invitations. But something strange had happened over the years with the simple wedding transformed into incredibly elaborate and extravagant affairs with no expense spared and nothing left to chance. But what about the actual marriage itself? How much marriage planning had gone in to ensuring the happy couple stands the best chance of remaining happy? As usual Alyas Karmani (Imam, Psycholo...
Insights: Demanding Women 🧕💪
July 21, 2019 22:10 - 55 minutes - 51.6 MBIt's summertime here in the UK and that means one thing...wall to wall weddings! You just can't move for invitations. But something strange had happened over the years with the simple wedding transformed into incredibly elaborate and extravagant affairs with no expense spared and nothing left to chance. But what about the actual marriage itself? How much marriage planning had gone in to ensuring the happy couple stands the best chance of remaining happy? As usual Alyas Karmani (Imam, Psycholo...
Insights: Pram Wars 👶🏴☠️
July 06, 2019 00:08 - 40 minutes - 37.7 MBAs the birth of our first child approached we did what any excited couple would do…we went pram shopping! But little did we know what this seemingly innocuous event would reveal so much about ourselves and our relationship. In this episode Alyas and I chat about conflict in relationships and the lost art of negotiation and compromise. This is the fourth episode in the ‘insights' series: a deep dive in to specific aspects of relationships as viewed and experienced through the prism of being U...
Insights: Pram Wars 👶🏴☠️ w/ Alyas Karmani
July 06, 2019 00:08 - 40 minutes - 37.7 MBAs the birth of our first child approached we did what any excited couple would do…we went pram shopping! But little did we know what this seemingly innocuous event would reveal so much about ourselves and our relationship. In this episode Alyas and I chat about conflict in relationships and the lost art of negotiation and compromise. This is the fourth episode in the ‘insights' series: a deep dive in to specific aspects of relationships as viewed and experienced through the prism of being U...
Insights: Don't Ignore Mental Health 😣 w/ Alyas Karmani
May 31, 2019 00:04 - 47 minutes - 43.7 MBIn this episode Alyas and I discuss how mental health can impact relationships and conversely how relationships are impacted by mental health. This is the third in the 'insights' series: a deep divie into specific aspects of Muslim relationships provided by counselor Alyas Karmani. Check it out. tw/Insta: @moiazam
Insights: Don't Ignore Mental Health 😣
May 31, 2019 00:04 - 47 minutes - 43.7 MBIn this episode Alyas and I discuss how mental health can impact relationships and conversely how relationships are impacted by mental health. This is the third in the 'insights' series: a deep divie into specific aspects of Muslim relationships provided by counselor Alyas Karmani. Check it out. tw/Insta: @moiazam
Insights: 8 tips for a happy marriage 💑 w/ Alyas Karmani
May 14, 2019 01:53 - 31 minutes - 29 MBThis is the second in the 'insights' series: a deeper dive into specific aspects of Muslim relationships provided by counselor Alyas Karmani. In this episode Alyas offers 8 behavioural traits - based on extensive research and experience - that lead to nurturing and sustaining a successful marriage. Always super fun talking to Al. Check it out.
Insights: 8 tips for a happy marriage 💑
May 14, 2019 01:53 - 31 minutes - 29 MBThis is the second in the 'insights' series: a deeper dive into specific aspects of Muslim relationships provided by counselor Alyas Karmani. In this episode Alyas offers 8 behavioural traits - based on extensive research and experience - that lead to nurturing and sustaining a successful marriage. Always super fun talking to Al. Check it out.
Ep8: It's Over?! 💔
April 26, 2019 11:41 - 46 minutes - 43.2 MBHow do you know when a relationship is over? Like really over? Throughout my 10 year marriage there were countless moments I thought we shouldn’t be together but we endured oblivious to the walls slowly crumbling around us. I guess what I'm asking is; at what point you should call it day even though you’re not 100% sure why? Email: [email protected] tw/insta: @moiazam
Ep7: It's Over?! 💔
April 26, 2019 11:41 - 46 minutes - 43.2 MBHow do you know when a relationship is over? Like really over? Throughout my 10 year marriage there were countless moments I thought we shouldn’t be together but we endured oblivious to the walls slowly crumbling around us. I guess what I'm asking is; at what point you should call it day even though you’re not 100% sure why? Email: [email protected] tw/insta: @moiazam
Introducing the 'Insights' series w/ Alyas Karmani 👥
April 05, 2019 14:41 - 30 minutes - 28.4 MBRemember Alyas Karmani? Of course you do! On one of my previous episodes he spoke passionately about his experiences of counselling Muslim couples over the last 25 years but painted a bleak picture of the future if the quality of relationships in the community didn't change for the better asap. It got me thinking: how can we start to affect change? 'Insights' is a new series of conversations that delve deeper in to relationship topics that impact the lives of Muslims and offers some practical...
Introducing the 'Insights' series 👥
April 05, 2019 14:41 - 30 minutes - 28.4 MBRemember Alyas Karmani? Of course you do! On one of my previous episodes he spoke passionately about his experiences of counselling Muslim couples over the last 25 years but painted a bleak picture of the future if the quality of relationships in the community didn't change for the better asap. It got me thinking: how can we start to affect change? 'Insights' is a new series of conversations that delve deeper in to relationship topics that impact the lives of Muslims and offers some practical...
Ep6: Fear & Loathing 😨
March 30, 2019 04:08 - 30 minutes - 28.3 MBThe vast majority of Muslims who live in the UK are people of colour. Many, if not all, have suffered some form of racism at some point in their lives and - with the rise of Islamophobia - are left feeling anxious and fearful. The ability to process these emotions healthily may be the only thing that stands between you and a failed relationship. Email: [email protected] tw/insta: @moiazam
Ep7: Fear & Loathing 😨
March 30, 2019 04:08 - 30 minutes - 28.3 MBThe vast majority of Muslims who live in the UK are people of colour. Many, if not all, have suffered some form of racism at some point in their lives and - with the rise of Islamophobia - are left feeling anxious and fearful. The ability to process these emotions healthily may be the only thing that stands between you and a failed relationship. Email: [email protected] tw/insta: @moiazam
BONUS Episode: The Front Line ⛑
January 23, 2019 18:36 - 49 minutes - 46.1 MBFollowing on from ‘Ep5: Couples Therapy’ this is a special bonus episode that I’m sure you’re going to love listening to. Alyas Karmani is a highly qualified relationship therapist who primarily works with the UK Muslim community. A few days ago we took some time out to chat about what he has learned from 25 years of counselling Muslim couples and uncover what it’s really like to be on the front line of Muslim relationship problems. Remember I really do love hearing your thoughts, comment...