Bad Counsel

Twink in a Box

Keywords tattoos, biohazard symbol, charm bracelet tattoos, spy, happy pills, childhood memories, interview, childhood, girlfriend, resemblance, gray hair, spy, controversy, fingering dogs' anal glands, Legoland, Disney World, party, infidelity, swinging, mistaken identity, guns, appearance, attraction, intimacy, fashion, style, acting, transformation, relationship advice, The Cure, Robert Smith, dressing for comfort, artists, setlist, drummer, book, stuck in an era, makeover conte...

G.W.A. (Gingers with Attitudes)

Takeaways Using TV shows as distractions can be helpful for parents. Parenting can be challenging and sometimes requires creative solutions. Taking care of pets, including expressing anal glands, can be a unique experience. Haircuts can be a source of frustration and anxiety for some people. Haircuts can be a source of drama and upset, especially when they don't turn out as expected. Understanding and empathizing with your partner's emotions, even if you don't personally relate...

Are You A Picker Or A Blower?

Takeaways Allergies can cause various symptoms, including rashes and other discomforts. Taking care of pets after surgery requires special attention and medication. The high cost of medications is a common concern for many people. Deciding whether to disclose COVID-19 status depends on the situation and the people involved. Gross habits and personal experiences can be a source of humor and entertainment. Tattoos can have personal meanings and symbolize new beginnings or embraci...

To Jerk, or Not To Jerk

Takeaways Funny stories and mishaps can make for entertaining and relatable content. Dealing with migraines can be challenging, but there are medications available to help manage symptoms. Having vomit-appropriate receptacles can prevent messy situations and embarrassment. Misunderstandings in text messages can lead to humorous moments. Moral acceptability is subjective and can vary depending on individual beliefs and values. Masturbating on a flight can be seen as morally acce...

The Marijuana Mongoose (or Sack Taps and Bean Dips)

Takeaways Inside jokes and playful banter create a fun and lighthearted atmosphere. Experimenting with edibles can lead to unexpected and entertaining experiences. Accommodations can vary and sometimes come with unexpected charges. Fantasizing about living together and creating a unique dynamic can be entertaining. Custom car horns and fart sounds can add humor and personalization to everyday experiences. Reflecting on a trip and the memories made can bring joy and laughter. M...

Armpit Licking

Takeaways Unexpected events can lead to interesting conversations and ideas. Alternative farewell ideas can be more meaningful and personal. Creativity can be applied to various forms of media, such as creating a film trailer. Naming objects or vehicles can be a fun and engaging activity. Personal experiences and perspectives can shape one's relationship with substances. Being high can lead to deep thoughts and epiphanies. Observing small details can lead to reflections on th...

Am I High?

Takeaways Marijuana can lead to funny and memorable experiences Different people have different reactions to marijuana Using tongue twisters can be a fun way to test memory and speech while high Marijuana affects individuals differently, with some experiencing stronger effects than others. Rasputin's penis is rumored to be in a museum in Iceland. Communication and setting boundaries are important in relationships. Planning revenge can be a fun and creative way to deal with diff...

How To Choose A Foreign Bride

Summary In this episode, the hosts discuss a range of topics including bounced checks, condo politics, rising maintenance fees, childhood reminiscing, self-esteem, movie recommendations, and personal grooming. In this part of the conversation, the hosts discuss various topics including ear hair plucking, movie theater etiquette, and the STI epidemic. They share their experiences and give humorous advice on how to handle these situations. In this part of the conversation, the hosts ...

Lollipop Lickin'

We are back from our short hiatus (and Gregg's world travels).   ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Venmo Taco

Summary The conversation covers technical difficulties, the shutdown of their YouTube channel, workplace harassment, condo association drama, the Monarchy Party and Anarchy Party, and lighting issues. In this part of the conversation, the hosts discuss the concept of a sugar daddy and how to help the listener's dad find a regular girlfriend. They also explore the idea of managing the situation and embracing the sugar daddy role. The hosts conclude by highlighting the great work the...

Fistful of Gummies

Summary The hosts discuss various topics, including getting skinny, attending comedy shows, embarrassing moments, celebrity crushes, and imaginary friendships. They also talk about the limits of geekiness, concert experiences, listening to music in the bathroom, and the idea of being a know-it-all. The conversation takes a humorous turn as they discuss polygraph machines and their plans for a group vacation. Takeaways Embrace your inner geek and don't be afraid to be a know-it-al...

The Real Housewives Of Bad Counsel

Summary In this episode, the hosts discuss various topics including their admiration for Michelle and Bert, celebrating Bert's one-year anniversary on the show, the weather in different regions, and the tradition of the Naked Bike Ride. They also talk about feeding pets and share a parenting question. The episode concludes with a discussion about holiday drinks. In this part of the conversation, the hosts discuss teaching kids to cheat and shoplift, sharing personal shoplifting sto...

The Healing Lie

We deal with a bunch of whiners and misfits this week, with a little holiday cheer! Send us a question and you'll be part of the show! X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Burt's Very Eatable A$$, Part Two

We help a listener out of a hairy situation, clean up a situation with a crappy project team member, talk an older sister through a somewhat troubling situation involving her younger brother, and so much more... Send us a question and you'll be part of the show! X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Go Forth and Spew

We learn why Burt's memoir will be titled "A Life in 15 Tabs", we help a naughty elf work through his Santa issues, help a listener become more hip with his carnal knowledge, and more fun stuff. Send us a question and you'll be part of the show! X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Poseidon's Kiss

We help a listener deal with the ghost who lives in his girlfriends car, we save another marriage over porn viewing, and how to deal with your backseat driving partner. Send us a question and you'll be part of the show! X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Waves of Self-Consciousness

Titles Burt wouldn't let us use: Sex Party; The Dungeon, Burt and His Wife Have a Quiet Night at the Neighbor's House, Those Hors D'Oeuvre's   Were Exquisite, Pinch Points are Always a Problem, and Please Pick Up Some Crackers.  Send us a question and you'll be part of the show! X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Degenerates

We help someone learn how to deal with their partners strange social awkwardness, we break down an interesting polyamorous Bro Code Breakdown, discuss "girl math" and "Burt Math", and share advice on how to shut down that bully boss of yours. Send us a question and you'll be part of the show! X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Dick Snooker

We help a wife who's been thrown a curve to overcome the latest turn in her marriage without getting bent; We help a couple translate their love language into something hotter; and we play three truths and a lie "Celebrity Edition" Want to be part of the show? Don't be scared. Send us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hurpy Durp Has No Face

Episode 126 is dedicated to Pepper, who was always as cute as a cookie. Want to be part of the show? Send us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Sexual Self-Exploration

Alternate Titles For This Episode: The Burt Equation The Wisconsin Waffle The Soft Hand Club The Prickly Pineapple Problem Unwanted Swinging Seeking some bad counsel of your own?  We'd love to hear from you: Send us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Kink Theory of Relativity

Its a voicemail extravaganza! We take several listener's voicemails and help someone successfully kidnap their ex's dog, help a wife who's angry at us putting ideas in her husbands dirty mind, learn about Gary's inability to sing the correct lyrics and so much more... Ask us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Burt's Very Eatable A**

Burt helps us answer how deep is enough, we help a shy date feel better about how delightful they are, and we learn why the three point stance isn't just for football Ask us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Googly-Eyed Dildo Party Favor

We help a mom help her kid dominate a third grade bully, play the fan favorite Florida Man game, and even help Tim solve a thorny problem this week. Ask us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Dry Glomming

Ask us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

You Want It Darker

"A goth masterpiece" - The L.A. Times "We LOVE stoned Burt" - The Providence Journal "Hoochie Mama becomes liturgical canon for local cult" - Miami Herald "Being nice is the new evil" - Tampa Bay Times "How to make the best out of a horrible situation" - The Baltimore Sun " Vintage Hitachi Color Television For Sale" - The Boynton Beach Penny Saver Ask us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail ...

Like Shaving a Walnut

Katy's high school CB handle, Jack is definitely the Holy Perv, vasectomy prep, and a completely shallow discussion about a girlfriend's use of TikTok as a life coach  Ask us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Broken Bro-Code

Superfan Jennifer Coolidge gives us a call, we have a massive breakdown in the Bro-Code, and we spend some time in the Mandela Effect Zone Ask us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

How To Poop In A Box: College Edition

We take questions exclusively from College Students this week and we help best friends work throu a classic Bro Code Breakdown, how an older student can fit in with the hipster kids, and how to make a successful podcast (spoiler alert - Lots of Booze!) Ask us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Adderall and Weed: College Edition

We take questions exclusively from College Students this week and we help best friends work throu a classic Bro Code Breakdown, how an older student can fit in with the hipster kids, and how to make a successful podcast (spoiler alert - Lots of Booze!) Ask us a question: X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Caffeine And Ketamine

We help stop a horrible marriage from happening, discuss Bingo Tramps, cover why Adderall is Burt's best friend, and talk about Mike being Drunk and Stoned in the ICU for weeks at a time. X - @badcounsel1  Instagram  - @bad.counsel Facebook  - @badcounselpodcast Email - [email protected] Voicemail - (541) 604-8487 ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

A Geisha, Brandy, Or A Scarlet Lady of the Saloon?

What to do about your neighbor who smells like shit, literally, the best opening line on how to pick up a guy at the bar, the multiverse and its direct connection to parenting, and what to do when your wife severely misuses a word around kids and coworkers. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

A Geisha, Brandy, A Scarlet Lady of the Saloon?

What to do about your neighbor who smells like shit, literally, the best opening line on how to pick up a guy at the bar, the multiverse and its direct connection to parenting, and what to do when your wife severely misuses a word around kids and coworkers. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Butterscotch Lube

We help a listener escape the wrath of a local GILF Mob, get back at a messy coworker and here how Gregg ghosted someone right after the drinks arrived at the table! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Dog Slobber Beer

Baby Talk

Get your favorite pacifier ready because this show will have you giggling all show long ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

#12 Butt Stuff

We give a buttload of advice to one listener, play Florida Man Fact or Fiction, and plot revenge on a sister-in-law ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Implosion

How to keep your roommate from stealing your gal, dealing with your partners annoying dog, and how to make fun of billionaires ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Itty Bitty Titty Committee

We start out with some potty humor, give some parental advice, and leave you with the most raunchy, disgusting, terrible (and hilarious) joke of all time.  Enjoy. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Poppin' Bouillon

This soup-smackin' show cuts deep with our best advice yet and includes the pilfering of panties, how to jam your friends junk, and why Stacy's mom was definitely traipsing! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

I Deserve The Paddle

We help a listener compose a breakup text, another deal with his wife's sudden love of hypnotism, and share with each other who our actual celebrity look-a-likes are ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Junk Liftin' Fun

Cousin Mike joins us this week! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Sloppy BJ's

Morman-á-trois

Alternative Episode Titles: Cock ring craziness, Soaking in Missionary, Amish oil change, Burt was a Pyro, Just shove it in, Lead with your porn tastes, Forcible ass eating ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Gen-X Blues

We talk 90's conspiracy theories, deadly maraschino cherry's, and the types of accountants the other accountants worship  ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Stripper A-hole Bank Shot

We help Katy with a parenting challenge, name a newborn baby girl, figure out who our celebrity doppelgängers are, and learn how sex can actually be a viable philanthropic endeavor (according to Burt) ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Schrödinger's Douche

Another marriage saved, Troll V. Troll, dic pic gone horribly wrong, and how long is long enough to mourn - all on this electric episode! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Easter Morning Dic Pic

Sphincter Plucking

Taking an organized crime approach to getting out of chores, how to deal with the neighborhood moms who aren't MILFs like you, and a request of the wise dudes ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Pube Positivity

In this episode, the Deleterious Enlightenment crew help Mrs. Vanilla deal with her husband's porn addiction, discuss fecal matter transplants, and why Katy's Ai friend wants her to break up with Gregg ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★