32. New Crush

You know the feelings of a new crush.

When it's so fresh and the sex, it's so good at first. 

So you want it all the time and it feels like a drug and you can't get enough.

But just like all drugs, after you use them enough they don't have the same high effect, but you get used to it, so it becomes a habit and you wanna quit or at least take a break but you can't cause it's comfortable doing what you know….ya know?

And that's how we get caught up in conditional love which leads to low-frequency emotions…

The newness turns into an addiction, and then you think it's love when it isn't, but you end up moving in with each other because it's the next thing to do, and then you get married, and then you have kids because you thought that would be cool….

Then the next thing ‘ya know, you're not having sex at all, so you're creepin’ on tinder with a fake profile just to see what's going on in the game, but you're not sure even how to play, so ya stay…

Never really feeling in love the way your soul wants…

All because it's what you know, and Monsters love what they know, even though you're miserable.

But unconditional love…

True love. 

love that's real…

It lifts you up.

It's always on.

And the sex is often, and it's always good, and you don't need to try so hard to make it flow because it just does it on its own.

That's what you really want…

Not some crush.

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